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Parents of young kids with a pet that is not long for this world: how did you navigate this? My eldest kinda knows about death but not the rest and Larry the basset hound has got maybe a year tops left. We got him before we were married so he's been a permanent fixture in the family. We've been through a lot with him and I may, in fact, cry about it this time.
I'm leaning towards getting another dog, probably a Golden, before he goes as a way to soften the blow. I'm aware this is a known strategy but is this considered bad form?
(Also accepting input from former little kids of dead pets.)
We just told our sons the cat died, and there are ceremonial things in Japan if you want (there is a cremation service). We buried her ashes out in the flowers under the mailbox.
Just a word of caution, Golden retrievers are my favorite dog, but are, at least in recent decades, prone to cancer. I am not sure why.
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The only dog I ever had died when I was about three and I remember when he died and it not really affecting me much. That being said, I'm sure there are books available to help young kids deal with this sort of thing. Maybe check some of them out?
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We don't sugarcoat death with our kids. I'm not 100% sure if they know animals don't go to Heaven, they're little, but when our last cat died, we just told them she died.
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Our family dog dying (of old age) when I was young was a formative event for me.
More impactful, though, was the death of my hamster because I was actually present and watching when he took his last tiny breaths. I actually wanted to take the poor thing to the vet to try to fix him, I hadn't understood just how little lifespan most rodents get.
Our cat got hit by a car and we only found out from a nice lady leaving us a voice message about finding the body after we put up Lost Cat signs. That did a number on all of us.
Also, I will always, every time, cry about the ending of Old Yeller.
Point being, its going to be a traumatic, stressful event no matter what. Only thing I can suggest is to help them redirect any blame/anger they feel away from any particular persons and also be ready to help field questions about their own mortality too.
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The second pet of the same type (cat/dog) is usually great because it usually breathes a bit of new life into the older animal. You're not just getting the kids a new puppy, you're getting the hound a new puppy.
The kid angle is too particular to the kid. We've had a few pet losses over the years. My son is sad for a day or two, but ultimately fine. My daughter still brings one up as a point of trauma 8 years later, to the point where my son has expressed horrified dismay at the thought of how she'll react when our oldest cat passes.
Just make sure they know it's something that you'll take care of, and give them space to be involved if they want (memorials, burial, etc).
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