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PaperclipPerfector  2d ago (text post)   7811 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of May 25, 2026

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What does "here" mean exactly?

Most of planet earth in 2026.

Presumably, "in America" or "in the Western world". As soon as you have a child, you are a slave to it by proxy. You have to raise it as the powerful members of your community wish it to be raised, or face social and governmental wrath. This has always been true, though state capacity increasing has made it worse -- getting disapproving sniffs from those who don't like the way you raise your child is not as bad as disapproving sniffs plus stern letters from "educators" and visits from CPS or the local police. And, the way they want children to be raised has gotten more and more intensive. Full time personal supervision of them. Not just school but all sorts of "enriching" activities. Every sort of safety measure. Supporting them until they finish undergraduate. Etc.

Yeah I've transitioned from having my first child in Australia as a nuclear family to having a second child in SEA with a far-larger extended family present, nanny and a culture that's generally more childfriendly. The amount of quality of life I've received back due to moving is insane, and it's better for the kids as well. Nuclear family two working parents trying to negotiate a child is absolutely punitive.

I am pretty sure parents have a lot of freedom though? The limitations that are forced upon parents, as far as I know, are as follows:

  • You must provide food, clothing, and shelter.
  • Take care of their hygiene until they can be expected to take care of it themselves.
  • You must provide a living space that lives up to a certain minimum standard of hygiene and amenities. But this standard is cleared even by most apartments. Don't be a hoarder and make sure to keep up with repairs, mold and so on, and you should be fine.
  • You must provide an education equivalent to that of public school. That is, your kid should be able to pass the same exams as everyone else.
  • You are not allowed to beat them, or put them in positions of physical harm.
  • You can yell at them, but only to the extend that it is not deemed abuse.
  • You are not allowed to have sex with them or handle them sexually.
  • Certain religious practices are considered child abuse.
  • Depending on the country, leaving young kids alone outside can be considered neglect. Although this differs wildly even between western nations. I believe America is especially hard on this.
  • In America, it seems like not affirming your child's chosen gender can cause the cops to be called on you. I don't know how widespread this actually is though; It could easily be mostly media fearmongering.

I think the last two are the only unreasonable points. But those are both specific to certain countries and don't explain why all of the west is seemingly facing the same issue. Otherwise, they all seem fine. You can homeschool if you have the resources. You can teach them your faith, although stuff like female circumcision is banned. You can teach them to not have sex before marriage. You can teach them a trade, you can try and make them expert sports players, or you can tell them that the world is a dangerous place and they should stay with you for as long as they can. In these cases, you may expect your kid to not fit in with others, as you are effectively raising them for a different culture. You can be cold, and passive, and distant, as long as you keep up with the basic duties of food, clothing, shelter, and education. Other parents may sneer at you and you may feel isolated. But legally you have a lot of wiggle room with how you want to raise your kids.

Full time personal supervision of them. Not just school but all sorts of "enriching" activities.

No one is going to take your kids away if you don't sign them up for a sport. And are you seriously saying that a group of 10 year-olds cannot play alone outside without it being called child abuse?

Supporting them until they finish undergraduate.

This is another thing that may be expected but it is not a policy that is enforced. You have the legal right to kick out your 18-year-old son, and refuse to save up for his college degree. The only thing you will face is judgement. But the government is not going to come after you for it.

You can sanewash it all you want, though the fact that you were able to come up with an 11-point list without much trouble kinda works against you.

And are you seriously saying that a group of 10 year-olds cannot play alone outside without it being called child abuse?

It's quite possible this will get the police and/or CPS called. Even if it doesn't, if something happens with one of these 10 year olds -- e.g. one or more gets a minor injury, or they trespass on the wrong neighbor's lawn -- the parents will be questioned about why they weren't supervising the child. And with that sort of question, there's no acceptable answer; the question is simply making the point that there was a transgression.

Most of the points are reasonable and essentially boil down to "ensure your children grow up healthy and with a basic education". The unreasonable points seem specific to America and thus don't work when you are trying to generalize to all of the west.

There is an argument that corporal punishment has a place in parenting, but as far as I can tell most parents are not capable of using it responsibly, so it seems reasonable that it is illegal.

You still have a lot of options on how to raise your kids.

Having to provide constant supervision for up to 13 years, depending on the specific local, is in fact extremely limiting, especially if there are a lot of rules about babysitting and so babysitters are difficult to obtain outside of 8 - 5 childcare hours (and difficult within those hours too outside of specific programs. I expect to obtain ~4 hrs of outsourced childcare over the next two months).

American child protection services (CPS) have powers way beyond that of most other government agencies. Children can be removed from parents for the time of the investigation, and returned months later, the quintessential 'process is punishment' phenomenon.

The intersection of child healthcare and government can also be very gruesome. Government may decide that a child should not be allowed to get medical treatment in another country as in the British case of Alfie Evans.

If you bring a child to an American hospital and you disagree with medical decisions there, they may call CPS on you if you want to leave. It gets really difficult to find adequate healthcare for your child if you disagree with the current political directions of health authorities, like under the COVID regime or the ongoing 'soul mixed-up at birth' transgender craze, which means you may get denied certain other services like access to a daycare or public school.

Anybody in your vicinity may disagree with your parenting, some American adults will call CPS on parents because unattended children play outside. This may not necessarily lead to the aforementioned dreaded removal, but it definitely weights on families.

This is all a result of the Civil Rights Acts of 1964, which made it illegal for Americans to choose their neighbors, and created a culture under which functional adults have to defend themselves from the assumption that they belong to the 10% under-functioning fringe that nobody should never ever officially discriminate against.

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