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PaperclipPerfector  4d ago (text post)   1571 thread views

Friday Fun Thread for July 3, 2026

Be advised: this thread is not for serious in-depth discussion of weighty topics (we have a link for that), this thread is not for anything Culture War related. This thread is for Fun. You got jokes? Share 'em. You got silly questions? Ask 'em.

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I accidentally on purpose ended up at a Korean BBQ restaurant. To my mild (or moderate dismay), I was confronted with an induction top and every indication that the dishes I'd want would need cooking. Normally, I'd assume that that service would be covered by a restaurant, but clearly they do things differently in Korean Scotland. East Korea?

I had very little idea what to do, and wasn't in the mood to learn how to use chopsticks on the field of battle. And I'd ordered ribeye and pork belly. It had arrived raw.

I was only pretending to be deeply distressed. There was absolutely no panic usage of ChatGPT involved. Quiet confidence all the way down baby. I tell myself that if my dad could teach himself laparoscopic surgery from textbooks at about my age...

I paid 37 quid for that meat. I could have fucking cooked it myself, or had about the same quantity at a regular restaurant. At least they didn't ask for a tip, given that this was taking self-service to a new level. Why not just present the cow next time?

On the walk back, I also experienced a sharp pain near my heel. A quick examination revealed nothing in my socks or shoes, but it did hurt quite a bit - exactly like being bitten or stung by a bug. There's a minor bump there now, so presumably we've got bugs with invisibility on the loose.

On the final stretch, I was video calling my brother. Last minute Apple Watch logistics, after the promised discount and creative accounting failed to materialize + confirmation that he'd finally had his appointment for the visa (uneventfully). I was interrupted by a gaggle of cute teenish girls and took out my earphones.

They didn't look like the Mormons who seem to accost me with regularity in those parts, so I asked them how I could help.

They wanted to know how tall I was. Huh. I gave them the honest answer: a hair or two above six feet. They remarked that they were surprised, because I'd looked ridiculously tall from a distance, giggled, thanked me and went off while glancing back every once in a while.

I stood there with a good natured but very bemused smile on my face. They didn't stink of weed. The experience was neutral. The most parsimonious explanation is that the invisible spider that bit me added a few inches of height, which I can't complain about. It would explain the week of barely manageable back pain. If that isn't the case, I'm going to start wearing platform shoes while insisting I'm actually 5'8.

This has been a rather perplexing day, but at least I'm safely in bed.

The most horrifying thing about this story is the cooking of Korean BBQ on an induction top instead of over burning gas.

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