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PaperclipPerfector  4mo ago (text post)   26681 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of December 11, 2023

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Having sex in a nightclub bathroom with an attractive stranger is the highlight of your life;

I realize I'm a bit of an outlier when it comes to sex, but does this really appeal to many straight men? That sounds more like a nightmare to me and I didn't think I was that much of an outlier.

"Highlight of my life" is putting it too strongly, but there's no question that having sex in public adds a great deal of excitement, especially if the girl is attractive and you don't know her very well (especially especially if it's the first time you've met her).

Are you forgetting the beautiful stranger part? I feel like you are thinking with the wrong head, which is to say your actual head, which is not the head most men would think with in that kind of situation. Of course, most men will never be in that situation too, which only increases my belief they'd do it, because they know they won't get another chance.

No, the stranger part is the biggest reason it's not appealing to me.

I'm sorry if this is inappropriate, but do you not think that might be an outgrowth of the fucked up things that happened to you in prior relationships with women? The way I viewed the hypothetical - a proposition from a beautiful stranger that becomes the highlight of your life - we are talking about the kind of hot that short circuits critical thinking. Not knowing someone is usually not enough of a concern to cut through that.

(Edit: fuck I'm an idiot, there's also the possibility you didn't read the hypothetical that way, I'm sorry.)

It looks like I'm the outlier around here though, based on the other replies in this thread. Personally I think it's demographics based - we'd get a different response if the motte skewed younger, more progressive or richer/poorer.

Although I also get the impression a lot of people are visualising having sex in a stall with a broken door, scraps of discoloured toilet paper draped haphazardly over everything, the bowl full to the brim with murky brown water and unsettling bubbles and a roll of toilet paper that has been soaked in piss and then dried out. But really you would go for the washbasins - they're cleaner, there's a mirror, and they're usually at a really good height logistically.

do you not think that might be an outgrowth of the fucked up things that happened to you in prior relationships with women

Not OP, but maybe? Though I think it's more likely to be a result of attachment style in general -- I never had interest in casual sex even before I had trouble dating. While I certainly have insecurities that having sex with a stranger would prod at, I also value my relationships with other people very strongly, and I don't find any value in sharing something as intimate as sex with someone who I don't know.

But really you would go for the washbasins

Wait, like the sink? So just out in the middle of the bathroom, with not even a stall door keeping you away from just anybody being able to walk in? That makes the hypothetical more appealing to you?

Wait, like the sink? So just out in the middle of the bathroom, with not even a stall door keeping you away from just anybody being able to walk in? That makes the hypothetical more appealing to you?

Yeah man, what's a stranger who walks in going to do? Stand and judge your form? What would you do if you walked in on that? Personally I'd avert my eyes and pretend not to notice, and that's what everyone else does too.

I mean, you could always jam the door to the bathroom shut if it's that big of a deal to you (I can't sing the praises of the sink over the toilet enough, it's just a vastly superior place to have sex) but in my experience that would likely kill your partner's enthusiasm - women who want to have sex in bathrooms are usually getting off on the exhibitionism.

I dated one girl who wanted to have sex in the stairwell to the car park of her corporate office. At fucking lunch time! Now that's insanity, but she almost broke up with me when I refused (nightclub sex became our compromise). It's not something society talks about much, but women's sex drives can short circuit their critical thinking too, and when it does the sex is amazing.

Actually I think that's where the idea of crazy chicks being dynamite in bed comes from - some moonbat with 5 cats and 70 'babies' made out of furballs and googly eyes isn't going to be amazing in bed. But a woman who has found a sexual stimulant which drives her crazy will be crazy good in bed, unlike a man who will just be crazy fast.

I’m with you on that. Hot girl looking to shag? I’ll do it anywhere she pleases. Doing it in a forbidden place is also hot and the kind of crazy story you’ll be able to score points with your peers on later (depending on your peers of course).

Yes. You are an outlier.

To me, having sex with an attractive woman in a restroom, even in otherwise ideal circumstances, sounds like it would be at most 50% as enjoyable as the same encounter on a bed or a couch.

Should I start identifying as a demisexual?

Huh. I'd expect it to be the sort of thing that's a 'fantasy' more in the porno sense than the 'would actually do personally if the opportunity knocked' one. Leaving aside longer-term issues like sticking your dick in crazy, and assuming that it's the woman's knees that are going to suffer from tile, there's a lot of pragmatic arguments for the discerning exhibitionist casual-sex seeker to head almost anywhere else (up to and including the proverbial Volkswagen Bug from Clerks).

The same for me, if we magically assume that no bad consequences will happen, then "nightclub bathroom" alone would be massive negative.

I can find worse places and situations, but almost anything else would be better.

Generally speaking, I think the hypothetical seems unappealing to a straight man because the kind of woman who would agree to this kind of scenario can, with high probability, turn your life into a nightmare.

If we magically assume that no bad consequences will happen, then "nightclub bathroom" alone would be massive negative for me.

Actually, the hypothetical is unappealing to me because it's fucking in a literal restroom and not, like, on a bed or something.

Plus I like to cuddle afterwards.

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