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PaperclipPerfector  1mo ago (text post)   2718 thread views

Small-Scale Question Sunday for March 10, 2024

Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?

This is your opportunity to ask questions. No question too simple or too silly.

Culture war topics are accepted, and proposals for a better intro post are appreciated.

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How does one find purpose/meaning? That is, what gives you a "reason to get out of the bed in the morning"? Particularly when "the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune" seem particularly aimed your way.

(More specifically, with neither the usual standbys of "faith and family," and while being too anhedonic for hedonism?)

Edit: to put it more simply, how do I find a reason to keep struggling through another 30+ years of miserable, pointless, futile existence, rather than just skipping to the end?

You have to create purpose / meaning.

Why are faith and family unavailable?

Hedonism is mostly meaningless.

You have to create purpose / meaning.

And how does one do that?

Why are faith and family unavailable?

For faith, raised pretty irreligious, have never found any religions possible (unless you count Xunzi's strain of Confucianism as a religion), none of the churches in my area seem like a "good fit."

For family, while I do get on well with my parents and two brothers, that's the whole of our family, and it's going to end with my generation.

Hedonism is mostly meaningless.

I know, but sometimes online I get people going on about how they avoid suicide by looking forward to the next Marvel movie, or the next World of Warcraft expansion, or whatever. And a bit more often I get "find something you enjoy doing, and then make your life about doing that," which both tends toward hedonism, and which doesn't really work when one doesn't really enjoy anything.

Check out Jordan Peterson's lectures if you haven't already. He helped me learn to accept religion from a sort of symbological point of view. Worth a shot.

And how does one do that?

For me, it was marriage, family and community. Though I tried hedonism for a decade before I married.

Part of the benefit of religion is the community / fellowship. You can experience something similar and secular organizations, Rotary Club, Lion's Club etc.

Why is family ending with your generation? Is it related to your ahedonia?

For meaning and purpose; something you enjoy is likely insufficient. I think you need to be part of a larger whole where your absence specifically is noticeable and detrimental.

Does anyone or anything depend on you?

You can experience something similar and secular organizations, Rotary Club, Lion's Club etc.

Wouldn't know how to join one, nor why they would want me as a member — plus, how I'd afford membership, transportation, etc.

Why is family ending with your generation?

Neither of my brothers want kids, for different reasons, and I'm a 42-year-old virgin who's never even been on a date.

I think you need to be part of a larger whole where your absence specifically is noticeable and detrimental.

And I have none.

Does anyone or anything depend on you?

Nope.

How long have you had the anhedonia? Any medication that may be contributing?

Do you have any plants, pets or livestock?

Have you discussed any of this with your brothers?

How long have you had the anhedonia?

Decades.

Any medication that may be contributing?

Well, I thought my antidepressant was supposed to be helping, and I don't think my antipsychotic or beta-blocker are contributing. (Though, I might find out soon when I run out and can't get refills because of issues with my Medicaid, because this state completely fucked up dealing with post-COVID backlogs and the current aftermath.)

Do you have any plants, pets or livestock?

A couple of simple houseplants. Livestock? In a tiny (subsidized) apartment?

Have you discussed any of this with your brothers?

Which part?

For faith, raised pretty irreligious, have never found any religions possible (unless you count Xunzi's strain of Confucianism as a religion), none of the churches in my area seem like a "good fit."

Have you considered talking to an actual apologist?

For family, while I do get on well with my parents and two brothers, that's the whole of our family, and it's going to end with my generation.

It doesn’t have to end with your generation. You can marry and have children.

Have you considered talking to an actual apologist?

Well, I do have a friend who is a tradcath with five kids…

You can marry and have children.

I'm over 40, unemployed (on disability), and have never even managed to successfully get a date.

Well, I do have a friend who is a tradcath with five kids

Give it a shot- there’s no shortage of very smart tradcaths who can explain reasons for why we believe what we believe.

I'm over 40, unemployed (on disability), and have never even managed to successfully get a date.

Ah, I take that back.

Give it a shot- there’s no shortage of very smart tradcaths who can explain reasons for why we believe what we believe.

He has. And has given up on trying to convert me — he once made a comment that it would probably take God Himself directly appearing to me and telling me to join the Catholic church to get me to believe, and maybe not even that, so now he just prays for my soul.

I meant you give it a shot- you want a community and a purpose and that would get you those things.

I meant you give it a shot

What, just show up to a church as a total unbeliever, and… then what?

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