The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
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My father just got out of a biopsy. It looks like his cancer might be back. They're keeping him for observation overnight, and I'm heading down in the morning if he's physically up for a visit.
I feel adrift. Throughout my life, my father has been one of the only points of stability that I have ever had, and I think he's dying. Every success that I have ever experienced is because I listened to his advice. Even when our relationship has been beset by physical distance, I've always felt that I could rely on him in a way that no one else in my family could offer.
What do you do with a pain so enormous that you can't even feel the edges of it? How can you be there for someone when you don't know what to do?
I can tell you what not to do, from experience. Don't become a functional alcoholic, and don't start sticking your dick in crazy. And oh, is crazy gonna be all over you. They can smell your vulnerability, and it excites them thinking of all the shit they'll put you through that they know you'll take in your fragile state.
I didn't have it at the time, but I've found church helpful dealing with stressors later in life. Funnily enough I remember walking past a church after my father died and thinking to myself "I never believed in it before, why start now?" But eventually life brought me even lower and I found great comfort in going to mass every Sunday.
Regular exercise also helped. Join a place with some community, like a martial arts school. Something with regular classes and a regular roster.
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