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Dating apps, on and off (because they are psychologically corrosive).
Dance classes (going to one tonight, actually), referrals from friends, bars (of various types), hosted gatherings at my house, gone to speed dating events, gone to car meets, church, social media, the gym. I'm currently pursuing a random DM I got from an (apparently) real woman on twitter that I already know isn't going to work out.
I am able to get dates. But the quality of woman I find is generally lacking, and they will ghost you without any warning even if you're 3 or so dates in. The norms around appropriate behavior are in shambles. Because women will accept zero correction of their behavior.
It is very expensive to keep paying for all these whilst seeing such poor results.
I've done everything except a Matchmaker or going abroad/mail order bride, basically. And I actually DID do a consult with an AI matchmaking startup, Keeper.AI and one of the founders himself told me "check back in 3-6 months" because they had no truly viable matches (as per their system) out of the 1.25 million women in their database.
The nearest/best one was a bit overweight for me, I was told. Ozempic to the rescue?
I wouldn't mail order but I would go abroad if you're in the anglosphere. Dating culture differs significantly within a country and between countries. In one place I dated for 2 years and never got stood up, in another place I got stood up frequently, in another I actually found a wife.
My top advice is just selection effects and heredity over everything. Men need to sample from as many places as possible through pure online dating but other than that you especially need to sample from wherever has the women the most like you politically and intellectually.
It still took me probably over a year and that's not counting the time I spent not using this strategy (that would make it several years), so 4 is not really out of the ordinary. Hopefully you will find something soon. The reality is that the system is messed up because it's all too costly and annoying in time and money even when it works out. What age bracket are you dating by the way? Marriage rates are down but young marriage is especially down so if you are dating under 25 it's clearly a systemic issue.
I sort of reject this solution because it exports the problem to that country. where are THEIR males supposed to go?
I mean, if I take a trip for other reasons and happen to find a wife, whatever.
Yes, and the political gap between young men and women is the largest its ever been. The women have flown off into la la land and nobody is correcting this trajectory.
Hence, the pool is too small.
I have no reason to think I will.
However, that is also not a reason to quit.
But understand that I AM OTHERWISE WELL SITUATED. I own a house. I make six figures in a decently high-status job. I am extremely physically fit. I am a martial arts instructor (i.e. I can physically dominate 90% of the male population), I am well liked, I can repair stuff, I'm not bad looking. And I'm six foot two.
There is zero reason I should be struggling.
And if I'm struggling, I can only imagine how bad it is for guys not so well situated. And I think its best to help out their plight too.
Basically anything above 21 and still in decent child-bearing shape. If I got my pick I'd aim for 25-27 (I'm most comfortable dealing with women in that bracket) but I have DIRECT EVIDENCE that I can pull 24-year-olds too.
But as to the filtering issue, finding a woman who is GENUINELY serious about getting married and is marriageable is the big one. There's no pressure on women to actually get married, and serious pressure on her to delay until she has her fun/her career is established. I don't think any individual guy can defeat this social pressure without a lot of assistance.
They marry your women. Go look it up you can find plenty of that, if you can't you are probably shooting for too low of a country. Don't marry a fillipina or cambodian.
You should assort on genotype and not phenotype. If you nail the genotype converging in your relevant beliefs will be easy. The easiest way to target genotype is to simply target a percentile among women. You do the same thing for height if you want tall kids (I don't recommend assorting on height now as that's frivolous and the market is in ruins) and intelligence. I believe that the median female is 4 IQ points dumber than the median man (a lot of people run denialism on this point but idk their issue), on top of greater male variability, which means that if I wanted to marry an at least 130 IQ man I can actually marry a woman with an IQ of only 121 or so.
Which countries would this be? Argentina and areas of not-indigenous S America? Indian/E Asian a little bit but still skewed heavily male taking female.
Even Bill Gates daughter took an Argentinian so definitely an equal play place.
Yes and the Catholic/southern parts of Europe are noticeably better than the US or UK when it comes to women. The protestant Continent is in between. He should probably start learning Spanish and French.
Catholicism seems mildly protective against the woke package as a whole, without necessarily defeating any individual piece. Including very liberal catholicism; even James Martin has some issues with the woke(boomer TDS, on the other hand).
It's not Catholic doctrine it's just population genetics that correlate with historical catholicism for contingent reasons.
Latin, Celtic, and mountain German- but not north Germanic- Europeans, Filipinos, and amerinds all have the same genes that allow for some parts of woke but not to embrace the whole package, clearly.
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