This weekly roundup thread is intended for all culture war posts. 'Culture war' is vaguely defined, but it basically means controversial issues that fall along set tribal lines. Arguments over culture war issues generate a lot of heat and little light, and few deeply entrenched people ever change their minds. This thread is for voicing opinions and analyzing the state of the discussion while trying to optimize for light over heat.
Optimistically, we think that engaging with people you disagree with is worth your time, and so is being nice! Pessimistically, there are many dynamics that can lead discussions on Culture War topics to become unproductive. There's a human tendency to divide along tribal lines, praising your ingroup and vilifying your outgroup - and if you think you find it easy to criticize your ingroup, then it may be that your outgroup is not who you think it is. Extremists with opposing positions can feed off each other, highlighting each other's worst points to justify their own angry rhetoric, which becomes in turn a new example of bad behavior for the other side to highlight.
We would like to avoid these negative dynamics. Accordingly, we ask that you do not use this thread for waging the Culture War. Examples of waging the Culture War:
-
Shaming.
-
Attempting to 'build consensus' or enforce ideological conformity.
-
Making sweeping generalizations to vilify a group you dislike.
-
Recruiting for a cause.
-
Posting links that could be summarized as 'Boo outgroup!' Basically, if your content is 'Can you believe what Those People did this week?' then you should either refrain from posting, or do some very patient work to contextualize and/or steel-man the relevant viewpoint.
In general, you should argue to understand, not to win. This thread is not territory to be claimed by one group or another; indeed, the aim is to have many different viewpoints represented here. Thus, we also ask that you follow some guidelines:
-
Speak plainly. Avoid sarcasm and mockery. When disagreeing with someone, state your objections explicitly.
-
Be as precise and charitable as you can. Don't paraphrase unflatteringly.
-
Don't imply that someone said something they did not say, even if you think it follows from what they said.
-
Write like everyone is reading and you want them to be included in the discussion.
On an ad hoc basis, the mods will try to compile a list of the best posts/comments from the previous week, posted in Quality Contribution threads and archived at /r/TheThread. You may nominate a comment for this list by clicking on 'report' at the bottom of the post and typing 'Actually a quality contribution' as the report reason.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Notes -
What evidence have you seen that makes this a matter of "fact" to you? From my understanding, the studies that show this are about as high a quality as studies on trans-youth medicine, relying on parental-reports of well-being and slanted samples.
Meanwhile, studies on heterosexual couples show that mothers and fathers parent differently and children living with unrelated adults suffer from increased stress measured by cortisol levels.
Parents and Stepparents even abuse and murder children in different ways:
Given this, my prior would be that a kid raised in a Same Sex household, where they are by default unrelated to at least one parent, would have poorer outcomes than kids raised by straight parents (where a larger percentage are raised by two related parents.) What have you seen that makes you confident otherwise?
I wouldn't be too surprised, tbh, if adopted children to gay couples showed better outcomes than an average child over the whole population. The reason is very simple - adoption is a selective process. Any adoption agency that isn't completely dissolved in wokeness and just melts with "awwww gays!" seeing any same sex couple, would require people to have stable relationship, clean home, decent income, etc. It's not that such people can't be abusive or just bad parents - it's just that the incidence in this cohort would likely be lower than over the whole population, where any couple with functioning plumbing can have as many kids as they feel like.
More interesting study would be comparing outcomes to adoptions of the similar social and financial stature, between same sex and hetero couples. But this may require a sample size that may be difficult to collect. We have less than 10 years when same-sex adoption has been fully legal, way too early to measure the outcomes.
This part of the review goes over research on comparing adoptions with adoptions:
So mostly you nailed it when you said it was too early. A lot of the negative factors that we would measure couldn't manifest in the literature for a while. Couples adopt kids under 6 years of age, but things like academic excellence, teenage drug and sex habits, etc are things that can only be measured from kids 14+.
However, I am not sure that the average adoptive parent provides better outcomes than average natal parents. When looking at mixed families of adopted and biological children, adopted children receive more attention but have worse outcomes. Could this effect partially negate the socioeconomic effect?
I mean there’s also the question of ‘are gay parents an even more selected group than adoptive parents’- is there something about gay adoption which sets them apart other than the obvious(could it be that gay adoptive parents are more pro-natal than adoptive parents generally because there’s less cultural expectation for them to have children? Maybe something of that sort).
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
Most of the time, the choice is not between "stepparents" and "parents", though. It is between "stepparents" and "orphanage", or rarely between "orphanage" and "parents" in cases of abuse by the latter. I haven't looked at the data of abuse in institutions but I assume it is worse than adopted families.
Please show me where all the orphanages are hiding in the US. But yes, I would assume that the further you get away from the "Biological mother and father raised me" the further you would get from the ideal childhood. I'm not sure what point you think you are making.
My point is step-parent outcomes are usually still better than any realistic alternative. Furthermore, the poster above you claimed same-sex couples are better parents on average than straight couples, which is not the same as step-parents vs. biological parents. Notably, the entire clump of "straight step-parents" is in the latter group in jewdefender's argument but the former group in your comparison.
Do you mean adoptive parents instead of stepparents? The alternative to having stepparents is your biological parent(s) staying single after they get divorced or are widowed.
The only way you’d end up being raised by just a stepparent is if both your biological parents died after at least one of them had remarried. Even then, stepparents don’t have any inherent legal rights as parents to their stepchildren. For a stepparent to be recognised as a legal parent of their stepchild requires the involvement of the court, just like any other potential guardian of an orphan. Such children often end up living with another biological relative like a grandparent, aunt, or uncle.
The court would consider a bunch of factors to determine if leaving the child in the care of their stepparent is appropriate. Things like the child’s age, their relationship with the stepparent, the feasibility of the stepparent being able to provide for the child by themselves, whether the stepparent is suitable to raise kids in general, the amount of time the child has spent living with their stepparent, the stepparent’s interest in caring for the child, etc. This would all have to be stacked up against any potential biological relatives caring for the child.
Yes, I mean adoptive parents.
Well then you and @OracleOutlook have been, at least in part, talking past each other. His original comment and the studies he linked are about stepparents not adoptive parents.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
I'm asking OP to defend one of the consensus-building statements he made, "there are a lot factual errors: ... children raised by two same-sex parents have equal or better life outcomes to straight parents." I'm not arguing for any particular policy regarding where to put kids once one or more of their parents are unwilling or unable to raise them.
OP is not going to defend his statements, he never does. OP is actually far right and I'm sure he thanks you for your service. You just keep walking into it, people.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
It's fine to have a prior, but when presented evidence otherwise, you should be willing to change your mind. That's what it means to have a prior, it doesn't mean planting your feet by a particular number.
Yes, please present me with that evidence? The whole comment was a request for the iron clad evidence.
You literally linked to such evidence in your post, just to dismiss it because it didn't fit your prior.
Plus, the whole point of Bayesianism is that there is no 'ironclad evidence'. You accumulate a lot of little bits of evidence that revise your opinion one way or another. That evidence can be anecdotes or case studies, or it can be more robust scientific meta-analyses.
Are you referring to me linking to "A Review and Critique of Research on Same-Sex Parenting and Adoption?" Because that is a literature review on the research of Same Sex parenting. I didn't dismiss it, it was my supporting document. You don't need to read the whole thing, just the abstract provides a basic gist:
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
Your links are comparing natal parents to step-parents, not adoptive parents; a single mother remarrying is completely a different environment compared to two infertile parents deciding to adopt and raise a child from infancy. Adoptive children seem to have poorer physical health but greater parental support than biological children, interestingly enough.
Also if a gay couple adopts a child, it’s not as if the child is being deprived of a mother and a father; the alternative to the gay couple is the child being raised in an orphanage and then going from foster home to foster home.
And in case you suggest it, I’m not sure a closeted gay biological parent in a sham straight marriage is preferable long-term to a stable gay marriage either.
In a modern, Western society...especially with gayness being heritable...I agree with you, here. You had a lot more support for the gay, closeted man or woman and a lot more pressure to be closeted fifty years ago, let alone a hundred years ago.
More options
Context Copy link
That would be true if there was any shortage of prospective adoptive parents, but IIRC there’s not- any baby up for adoption has someone to adopt them, who’s probably been on a waiting list for a while.
My understanding is that while there is not a shortage of prospective adoptive parents for babies, there is one for children.
My understanding is that while that is partially true, it leaves out that many of these children are not particularly adoptable for one reason or another(severe trauma, disability, what have you, even leaving out that many children in foster care aren’t even theoretically available for adoption because CPS hopes to eventually reunite them with bio parents) and that gay prospective parents are not lining up to adopt them any more than infertile heterosexuals are anyways.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
I just want to know what caused the OP to know for a fact that children raised by homosexual couples fair better than children raised by heterosexual couples. My latter links explain my priors, not the base argument itself in an apple to apples comparison of homosexual vs heterosexual child rearing. My first link is a literature review of the research comparing heterosexual and homosexual parenting, ultimately finding it insufficiently powered as a whole to answer the question.
But some additional topics:
I knew that adoptive children have greater parental support but worse outcomes. It seems more of a useful datapoint for HBD and the nature vs nurture debate.
It doesn't usually go "gay couple adopts a child," the more common arrangement is gay parent brings biological kid from prior relationship into new gay marriage.
It's not so much about the inevitable "some kids end up in less ideal situations, and we make do" but rather what we take as an ideal. Our ideals will influence the decisions we make and the societal outcomes for kids overall. If the ideal is Gay Space Communism, where every child is birthed in an artificial womb and assigned to a polycule or raised in a state facility, would that child have a better outcome than a kid raised in a traditional extended family unit of biologically related people? Which should we encourage more of with our cultural storytelling and social practices?
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link