domain:acoup.blog
Muninn
"Dick Laurent is dead."
22hr ago
What is your advice for getting to know the ins and outs of a local community? We just bought a house and are joining an HOA for the first time.
Umm, abandon all hope ye who enter here? (Kinda sorta but not really) Kidding!
I've had the misfortune pleasure of living in two separate places with different flavors of homeowners organizations. The first community in question was a relatively large community of several hundred houses and the second was a much smaller community of ~50 houses. Both communities provided water and road maintenance for the respective homes. The first had some pretty restrictive covenants, was well run, and expensive AF while the second was almost completely unrestricted, cheap AF, and still trying to live in the close knit community days where everyone knew everyone and households pitched in together to fix community problems, which to me does not seem to work in the 21st century. Regardless, my experience has been tons of dramatically unreal expectations and soul sucking low stakes drama, which greatly inhibits the ability of the HOA to do meaningful things. This was, IME, especially true of the smaller community, which did not have enough of a homeowner base to really afford the type of service and reliability that the homeowners desired and expected. Both communities were big on getting new homeowners involved in the HOA. DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE ROPED INTO THIS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. Leave the complainers and the power trippers to each other--your sanity will thank you.
quiet_NaN
22hr ago
The sheer malice of Hamas is pretty much how they convinced me that they should be utterly destroyed.
I think that in the missile exchanges with Iran, there was little in the way of trading risk to soldiers vs risk to civilians.
I also believe that in the context of Gaza, a significant fraction of civilian deaths are the result of decisions with such trade-offs. Infantry is vastly less deadly to civilians than bombs are, but of infantry is also much more at risk from Hamas than bomber pilots are.
self_made_human
Grippy socks, grippy box
22hr ago
I feel like this scenario is exceedingly unlikely, and if it comes to pass, then the women will also be able to enjoy the unlimited attention of caring and attentive (while dark and brooding) AI Husbandos.
Even if that's not the case, there's probably enough residual demand for Legacy 3D Women that they'll find some men to give them attention. Ugly women manage today, somehow.
NYTReader
23hr ago
Did anyone parent's play Tom Lehrer in the house growing up? I just read that he passed away at 97.
Weirdly, despite my dad being a pretty devout Catholic, he was a big fan of The Vatican Rag. I remember him singing it on more than one occasion.
quiet_NaN
23hr ago
I think that this hinges a lot on the distinction between soldiers and civilians. An enemy soldier for a side which does not respect the Geneva conventions is owed nothing more than a quick death when captured.
By contrast, non-combatants have a (limited) right not to be injured by war no matter whose side they are nominally on. If a bunch of neolithic tribe members were isekaied to the trenches of WW1, they would be entitled to protection, you can not just say "obviously their tribe is not a signatory to the Geneva conventions, so it is fine to bomb them".
It is hard to fight an enemy on equal footing when you are bound by some moral constraints, but often, either the moral constraints are not all that hampering (allowing advancing Jewish GI's to carry out mass shootings against German civilians in retaliation for what the Nazi's did would have been wrong, but it would also not have given the Allies much of an edge), or the fight is very much not on equal footing.
If a police unit is trying to catch a band of letter bombers, they have a lot of advances over their enemies. Sure, there might occasionally be situations where the best tactical option would be for them to send bombs to the band themselves, but they can still win without that.
ThomasdelVasto
Κύριε, ποίησόν με ὄργανον τῆς ἀγάπης σου
23hr ago
I'm on the fifth book of Card's Tales of Alvin Maker and wow, an amazing Fantasy series. It stuck in my mind as a kid because the storytelling is so good, but going back and reading it now is incredibly rewarding. I'd give it a try if American fantasy appeals to you at all.
ThomasdelVasto
Κύριε, ποίησόν με ὄργανον τῆς ἀγάπης σου
23hr ago
What is your advice for getting to know the ins and outs of a local community? We just bought a house and are joining an HOA for the first time. There are various things I'm a little frustrated about in the community, but overall it seems like a good place.
We plan to stay here for a while, so I don't want to come out brandishing my frustrations first thing. How would you go about learning more about the community, outside of going to the meetings and social events and such? (which we plan to do)
Also, feel free to use this as a general thread to discuss good or bad HOA experiences! I'm curious...
Quantumfreakonomics
23hr ago
Nice try New York Times.
I'm going to say about 15 miles for all of these, plus/minus 15 miles.
thrownaway24e89172
Death is the inevitable and only true freedom
23hr ago
What happens when women can no longer command attention?
They will do the same thing they've always done in this situation--abuse social power to outlaw alternatives so men's only choice is to give them attention. And then whine that they get too much attention from men.
NYTReader
1d ago
Despite teenagers and young adults having less sex than they did thirty years ago, it's still trivially easy for a woman to get a man to fuck her. Apropos of my recent comment where I highlighted a Twitch streamer completing basically every sexual fantasy with over a dozen of partner by her mid-20s, a moderately attractive woman can acquire almost any man in her surrounding social environment for sexual gratification. College is one vehicle for this, as are "dating" apps for those with only a high school degree and such.
Naturally, the sexual revolution has also benefited men, at least strictly in terms of having more women to fuck. After all, more women having sex with multiple partners means men also have more lifetime sexual partners. Men have the added benefit of not being subject to the same degree of social shame for having bedded multiple women.
sohois
1d ago
There's a farm on the Isle of Dogs that is probably the closest to the average Londoner, but even outside of that are quite a few farms inside the southern boroughs
Okay, if your hypothetical came about -- what do you think they'd do? Don't just put us on the spot like that -- it sounds like you have something to say. Say it!
Add to that a growing visibility of trans women in romantic spaces
Last time I checked, only 3% of heterosexual men report that they would date a trans woman. Maybe that's increasing. But even if we granted that huge numbers of men gained a newfound interest in trans women, it simply isn't the case that trans women will form some great competition for cis women. There aren't many of them (what, like half a percentage point?), and most are not interested in heterosexual men, whether because they perceive heterosexual men aren't interested in them, or because they believe they can't build a relationship with them, or because they prefer women. We're looking at a fraction of a fraction of a percent here.
It's possible that some fraction of bisexual men will start dating men at higher rates (see the "I traded women for femboys" meme), but my understanding is that the situation for male-male pairings is that sex is easy to find, but ghosting and avoidant attachment is even more common than among straight men.
Sometimes straight men like to proclaim, "maybe I will go gay!" like a kind of protest, same way that women annoyed with men sometimes start investigating political lesbianism, but same-sex pairings are just different in important ways due to biological and cultural factors. The grass is rarely greener on the other side. Fantasies aren't going to save you, and trans women aren’t your fantasy. They’d be the first people to tell you that.
hydroacetylene
1d ago
Cats.
Probably EU countries have their own individual laws on this. I know that outside the EU, in Switzerland, you are allowed to record in public, but not allowed to publish photos or videos of people without their consent at all.
(This is interpreted as recordings where a person is the focus of the image, so if you take a picture of your friend at tourist spot and there happen to be some random people visible in the background, that's still okay.)
That means live streaming in public is essentially illegal in Switzerland, as is the popular genre of Youtube influencers harassing people in public to get a rise out of them, including those obnoxious 1st amendment “auditors” that are intentionally annoying people.
2rafa
1d ago
This happens to most formerly-pretty women past a certain age. The unlucky ones get fat or ugly by their early 20s, those who care more and stay put-together and healthy can “enjoy” (and sometimes, often even, it is enjoy, but rarely always) male attention into their early 40s. The truly valiant crusaders, the 99th percentile, the $100k deep plane facelift aficionados, can make it to 60 as milfs. But age comes for everyone lucky enough to live out a whole life, and most women make do. Some go a little crazy for a while (an overdone and trite topic in women’s literary fiction, especially of late), most don’t.
Some young women will always want male attention, but even if most young men are inside playing VR waifu simulator, my guess is there will still be enough around to offer it.
2rafa
1d ago
I was raised with a hardcore anti-tattoo worldview (both about getting them and about people who have them). My parents are both secular former hippies with liberal views on sex, abortion, modesty, whatever. I suspect it might be a Jewish thing, although my family is very secular, and I know other secular Jewish parents their age who don’t seem to care.
4doorsmorewhores
1d ago
- 3 kilometers
- 1 kilometers
- 19 kilometers, dairy
- 2 kilometers. (This is a Canadian station but the Amtrak line from NYC 'Adirondack' runs there, otherwise a station owned and operated exclusively by Amtrak is 109 kilometers)
- 6 kilometers
- 18 kilometers
Not to bury the lede this is downtown Montreal
Muninn
"Dick Laurent is dead."
1d ago
Ministry: The Lost Gospels According To Al Jourgensen by Al Jourgensen and Jon Wiederhorn.
Oopz
1d ago
What happens when women don’t get attention?
The old adage says men want sex the way women want attention. But attention, unlike sex, seems easier to come by... for now.
As dating grows more complex, and sometimes risky for men, we’re seeing the rise of alternatives: AI girlfriends, VR porn, sex robots. Add to that a growing visibility of trans women in romantic spaces, and a strange new question emerges:
What happens when women can no longer command attention?
We know what many men do when they’re denied sex or companionship. They turn inward or rage outward. Some retreat to forums. Some go monk mode. Some hit the gym. A few, tragically, turn violent.
But when women can’t get even a glance, no matter how they dress, how they walk, or how perfect their makeup is, what then?
I suspect they won't react like men.
Southkraut
The rain fell gentlier.
1d ago
The Worm Ourobouros, again and still.
Faithful Executioner: Life and Death, Honor and Shame in the Turbulent Sixteenth Century. I read a Kindle sample and found its subject matter interesting, but the actual treatment of it seemed convoluted and overly materialist, and on top of that the full book is quite expensive. I'd rather just read Frantz Schmidt's diary directly, if I could get a reasonably readable edition of it. All I find is direct scans of 19th century versions in fonts that are cute in their antiquated way, but to be quite honest I'm habituated to more accessible typography.
EdenicFaithful
Dark Wizard of Ravenclaw
1d ago
So, what are you reading?
Still on a bunch of stuff. Adding Red Dynamite: Creationism, Culture Wars, and Anticommunism in America, another open access book, to my list.
hydroacetylene
1d ago
Employers having to pay for training. This is pretty normal for skilled blue collar workers, but getting into the program might require previous academics- electrical apprenticeships generally want to know your high school algebra grade.
For lots of white collar workers I'm not sure how that system could work in practice that doesn't look a lot like a university. Are doctors going to work their way up from being CNA's?
hydroacetylene
1d ago
I think- university employees being a small group that's super confounded- it'd be better to compare freshmen at state flagships to seniors in high school. There's not that big of an age difference and state flagships usually take only the top x%.
Unfortunately, if your enemy does not give a fuck about civilians, that does not mean that you do not have to give a fuck either. If a police department solved a hostage situation by bombing the building and killing everyone inside, they could claim that actually who was really responsible for the civilian deaths was the hostage taker. Still, it would reflect horribly on them.
As an aside, I don't recall that the IDF has made much of a credible move to get the civilians out of the Gaza war. If they had offered a ICRC run shelter where the IDF kept the peace to every Gazan who did not want to die for Hamas when they started invading, that would have updated me a lot towards "the IDF does their best to keep civilians safe". Instead, they told them "we are fighting here, go there" sometimes, but were generally unwilling to allow them into places where Israel would be responsible for their needs.
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