practical_romantic
Pretending to be a cs undergrad.
User ID: 975
practical_romantic
3mo ago
I would rather use condoms, avoid girls with a high likelihood of them and get vaccines. I do not want to get one ever. Feels scary.
practical_romantic
3mo ago
It does not solve the root cause, same for drugs.
practical_romantic
5mo ago
Stipe was also 50-60 lbs lighter given how much weight ngannou cuts, that is like 3 weight classes
practical_romantic
5mo ago
Yep, heavy hands podcast and Jack Slack have the same analysis of it. Had fury just outboxed him instead of trying to get him out early, he would have won easily.
I am not doing well at all, I pulled my first 14-hour day a few days ago, it was not clean at all but I went from doing nothing to actually being somewhat better than what I thought I could be, from 0 hours per week to 40 plus. I have to implement this paper on Spectrograms and train some models (Deep learning stuff) and so far the pre-processing part has been kicking my ass and the deadline of the weekend has made me go nuts. I cannot sleep, all I think about is failing this assignment and never making it to the lab I want to work in. I do not want to work the lower paying jobs in the Indian market and wanted to pursue this Deep Learning thing full time, My undergrad got over a few weeks ago and I took the plunge. The research position pays peanuts and I would happily work for free or pay out of my own shallow pockets to work on the kind of stuff that I wish to work on but alas.
I am still working out, I am close to 157 lbs (I began at 145 and at maybe the same level of body fat percentage at 6 foot, totally untrained, still look the same though) and even did MMA for a while. Life just keeps getting worse, I see all my classmates from high school and uni lapping me and getting into great grad schools, partying, enjoying life whilst I am anxious, doing as much work as I can and still failing. My bad decisions have caught up to me but I had to take a day off totally as I was too stressed and too tired to work.
My life sounds like a broken record but the harder I try to fix these things, the more pain I feel. What if I do not get this gig and have to hear my parents and everyone I know scream at me and mock me for trying to get to grad school or trying something like research? It haunts me, I have never worked, studied or even been productive in my life and when I try my hardest I get hit with worse outcomes. My doctor diagnosed me with ulcers due to high amounts of stress and each day I hate myself more, the only reason why I do not hate myself as much as I should is that I try my hardest. Deep Learning stuff is quite fun too, I find the jupyter environment and training models way more fun than anything I ever learned in uni. Udemy and Fastai are great tools.
With no phone, no girls, no social life, no surfing as I blocked everything on my browser or any other distractions, I have been trying this for 2 weeks and can feel tired and helpless. Even really scared of posting about it here or to my friends as I am a frequent liar of sorts so it is reasonable to be skeptical Plus I am not exactly a blood relative that anyone would care beyond a point. Everyone thinks I am a fuck up who would pick garbage and see me as the village idiot. No one else will implement the paper for me and my problems are my own but I always thought that if I worked hard enough some day, I would feel proud of myself but that was fleeting as the next day I realised how much harder this thing was.
Please do not judge me, I am scared and each day I feel worse about my own life. I am sorry. I wish I were more competent but I am finally trying and I just hope that I get my break in a good lab and more importantly that I do get good at the deep learning stuff. The lab is not the main thing here, my not being good enough is and I hope I get there soon.
practical_romantic
8mo ago
Will watch the fights tomorrow, that is about the extant of what I will be doing lol. I cannot enjoy anything else in life as everything is so dependent on me getting the research position I want and shipping these two products in the next 6 months. Still, will watch the fights, spent last week with a fellow clan member who studies in the US, we went around town, saw all the tourist attractions. Dude makes close to 6 figures whilst working a day job, going to uni and shipping his own stuff at his startup whilst being 4 years or so younger than me. We went out to a watering hole at night too and it was amazing. Learnt a ton from him, cannot wait to watch the fights tomorrow and start work.
Also has anyone seen the movies that came out recently? Modern movies seem to be quite political so I tend to just avoid them as much as I can, latest Mission Impossible was a disappointment, Oppenheimer was great, recommend that to everyone, I do not think anyone here would much like barbie (I did not even see it given the juvenile plotline).
practical_romantic
8mo ago
On second thoughts, no need for a weekly thread.
practical_romantic
10mo ago
I was just looking for ways of sticking to both my strength training and mma. I really wish to be consistent this time around. Most info on google is pretty clickbaity.
practical_romantic
10mo ago
No. I'm a 23 year old male who has never done anything physical in his life besides some inconsistent working out. I'm 6 foot and weigh 150 lbs. I have been working out on a neaely semi consistent basis for a month or more.
My coach saod that my body will adapt to the mma in the weeks to come but I thought getting a different opinion would help. I just don't wanna look Michael Cera like.
practical_romantic
10mo ago
Any tips on how to ensure I do not feel beat up after working out. I do 4 workouts a week in the morning (upper and lower split) using HIT and do 6 days of MMA for 6 days a week. I began last week and have terrible sleep and bad food habits so feel sore all the time. I have seen a reduction in my levels of soreness so just wanted to get some decent advice. I am a farily skinny rail untrained person and have in fact made progress whilst working out infinitely slower by fucking up my sleep previously so please lemme know what things I can and should expect and possible remedies. Thanks!
practical_romantic
11mo ago
Thanks man.
practical_romantic
11mo ago
Good advice. Will work out and eat before I drink, also get plenty of sleep.
practical_romantic
11mo ago
Yeah. With occasional cigarettes, you at least get immediate feeling of intoxication, alcohol takes longer to kick in and lasts a whole lot longer.
practical_romantic
11mo ago
We'll be at a resort so no driving fortunately but I'll keep your advice of being helpful in mind.
practical_romantic
11mo ago
Yeah. I don't drink as I've seen the ill effects and am not stable or on the right path for now so see alcohol as an escape from reality not very helpful currently. Next weekend is a good day off to try it once before life settles down.
practical_romantic
1yr ago
how do i add you?
Can you please dm me your username on that platform?
practical_romantic
1yr ago
lmao. the og fast food!
practical_romantic
1yr ago
Just began chess. It is a cool hobby. I am at that noob phase so no theory for now but chess is one sport I like because it is mostly just analysis even when you watch it, less parasocial elements.
Anyone here on lichess?
practical_romantic
1yr ago
I'll try another anti depressant.
I'll be using algoexpert for my job prep stuff. Thanks for the recs.
practical_romantic
1yr ago
Do jal neti daily with warm water and a neti pot. Best thing ever.
practical_romantic
1yr ago
Fair point. I did make some changes to my life but they happened slowly. I feel that I have maxxed out whatever advice I could get from this place so should look towards prolonged isolation now as it's hard for me and others to see any meaningful progress on a weekly scale.
I did remove my wifi and will start ensuring that my phone is locked by either my dad or ma to reduce usage.
practical_romantic
1yr ago
I use third party websites to do this so will block domains. Thanks for the suggestion pal!
practical_romantic
1yr ago
Yeah. I just cannot get over my oneitis. The only way to get over is to meet more girls and the only way to do that is to study well, have a fixed routine i follow and exercise (+ meditate) so that I can actually move to some place like delhi and work on a remote job.
I will add website blockers on my phone and laptop. It only hurts to see her happy with her boyfriend but otoh life will get better if I spend more time doing things irl instead of having a needy little oneitis. I did way better than someone like me should have on my first night out so it is more of an issue of just doing things more than taking the easy path and being online. You should be able to walk away from every girl on the planet at the blink of an eye, that is true abundance.
I will also ban reddit, twitter etc. Just need momentum, first few days are the hardest.
practical_romantic
1yr ago
I developed a terrible habit of looking at the IGs of girls I used to talk till early 2021 before I left IG forever. Any opinions or tips or pointers on how I can curb this bad habit. I have removed my study's wifi router and download everything I will need to study so as to reduce my usage. Best internet usage is just saying Hi to a bunch of smart people in places like this one and getting advice you apply in your life. I hate the internet now as low status, low value me can feel good about myself or get some status as a fringe e celeb whereas the only way to lead life is to do important things IRL on a consistent basis.
How do i stop myself from checking the IGs of other girls. I use third party apps often and it is kinda pointless at this point. Life on IG is only a small snippet for what happens to you irl if you are not a total loser or internet addict or both. Checking the IG of my former oneitis does hurt but otoh not being able to get with her caused me enough pain to not use the app again (I deactivated) and start a parallel group of like minded people (something like themotte but on whatsapp or telegram) where I have people who are actually successful in life while also trying to help to the best of their abilities as they genuinely would be happy to see me outdo them
I know, I think I am depressed, I do not know what happiness feels like, I always feel like I have not worked enough.
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