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Lizzardspawn
2hr ago
If I can quote Shoe on head -
"oh my God we need a liberal Joe Rogan" You had a liberal Joe Rogan his name was Joe Rogan but he was too edgy too problematic
George_E_Hale
insufferable blowhard
2hr ago
Hard core.
FiveHourMarathon
Wawa Nationalist
2hr ago
It's weird juxtaposing how ubiquitous porn is with how much its consumers seem to hate it and the people who produce it.
Like even smokers defend their hobby more.
thejdizzler
2hr ago
Chores spreadsheet basically just means doing my chores on time. I've got stuff like changing kombucha and yoghurt cultures and dusting/vacuuming that have longish time horizons that would be better if I spread them out, hence the spreadsheet.
Tree
2hr ago
I think it’s because the only ones who know, have nothing to gain and a lot to lose by publicizing that information. First they don’t want to admit to themselves that they may have made a costly mistake, when it’s too late anyway. And even if they somehow avoid the psychological sunk cost trap, they realize the husband and children would only be sad to hear it. So the next time the subject comes up, they just mumble something about not wanting to have to buy a bigger car.
Generally, I think there’s way less people who say they regret having children, than there really should be. You’re already at disneyworld, you drove 8 hours for this, paid 400 dollars, might as well pretend everything is great.
Fruck
Lacks all conviction
2hr ago
Or your purpose in life is to get recreationally smashed in the balls.
George_E_Hale
insufferable blowhard
2hr ago
I hate running and used to run on a team so I know I hate it. But if you're fap free and young you'll need that physical exertion/exhaustion as a counterbalance. I think all these are fine though I don't know what Chores spreadsheet might have on it. I hate spreadsheets of that sort (I prefer a legal pad, or just doing the goddam chore) but whatever. I'd also in addition to these add something about being social. All of these sound very solitary. Fit in real life people.
Tree
2hr ago
Nobody said anything about the extinction of the species
I was exaggerating for comic effect. I just think you’re very very wrong on men’s willingness to get kicked in the balls for their children.
TitaniumButterfly
2hr ago
Yes, and that's why the status quo lies where it does.
There's a large contingent, maybe even a plurality, that believes that being born from parents who didn't want you sucks
I realize that you're not making this argument here but I've always found it awful. What's worse -- having parents who didn't want you, or literally being dead? The whole concept suggests a broken understanding of life to me; some kind of deep conviction that life is only worth living if it's not too far from ideal (by whatever random standard). Same with the people on reddit who say that if every child can't have their own bedroom that's abuse and it would be better not to have them.
Never mind that a lot of people are waiting in the wings to adopt; never mind the many, many people who have gone on to live great lives despite rough beginnings. Sorry kiddo, you're not going to get this one fairytale thing that I've arbitrarily decided is more important than life itself; down the drain you go!
ThomasdelVasto
Κύριε Ἰησοῦ Χριστέ, Υἱέ τοῦ Θεοῦ, ἐλέησόν με τὸν ἁμαρτωλόν
2hr ago
I just watched the Dear Elon letter and it was hilarious. @Closedshop what else should I watch?
Clementine
2hr ago
Any theories as to why?
Amongst my friends, I know we sometimes don't talk about it if there's anyone struggling with infertility in the room, since it seems insensitive. But that doesn't really suffice to explain a strange seemingly culture-wide taboo. Especially as you mentioned in spaces where that kind of topic seems relevant.
I have weird pseudopsych theories like "people instinctively shy away from thinking about how much suffering they possibly caused their own mother" but I don't really take that seriously as a real explanation... and "it's a conspiracy of silence to keep the human race going" is pretty absurd... And something like "oh well it's a topic that makes people uncomfortable" just doesn't seem likely, there's plenty of topics that make people uncomfortable and yet get talked about.
I just feel like I walked into having a child fully aware that labor was painful — that I definitely was warned about, that everyone talked about birth plans etc, I said I'm an overplanner and I mean it, I was researching hypnobirthing and tens machines and all that stuff before I even went off BC — and yet somehow there was this giant, humongous, gaping, blind spot around the immediate and long term health costs of pregnancy that even now years later I just find baffling. I went to pregnancy classes and it didn't come up??? I spoke to doctors before I became pregnant about what I needed to do and know in advance and it was never mentioned?
To this day I still feel like it was treated as if anything short of being actually hospitalized just didn't matter.
(After writing all of this up I think "well maybe it's the sexism stupid" but is that really sufficient an explanation? Like yes I know feminists have been beating the drum about women's health being ignored, dismissed, and neglected and I know it's true, but is that alone enough to explain it?)
Tanista
2hr ago
His schtick mostly seems to be begging the Democrats not to be crazy (and failing) for 1.5 years, and then spending the other 0.5 years during peak election season (midterm and presidential) sheep herding all the audience he grown being "contrarian" into voting Blue No Matter Who anyways because "The Republicans are still worse."
You missed Step 0, where he's in denial about how crazy Democrats are. See the "menstruating men" discussion with Dennis Prager.
I didn't say it was stupid. It's no different than doing judo or boxing.
That isn't true at all. It's significantly different! Doing boxing or judo, the goal is to not get hit. Even if you fail sometimes and do get hit, in principle you can get better and avoid that outcome more often than not. Moreover, the fun in those things comes from the contest of skill, not... some weird form of masochism where you let people hit you in the face for fun. So no, those are not at all the same thing.
Because you lack this formative experience of pain, you find the pain of labour to be unbearable, so you think it cannot be expected of anyone, thereby.... dooming humanity to extinction.
You have extrapolated way too much from my post. All I said is that men wouldn't choose to get hit in the balls to have a child. Nobody said anything about the extinction of the species, nor did I say anything about the pain of labor.
George_E_Hale
insufferable blowhard
3hr ago
I'm now wondering what the redhead"s problem was aside from garden variety psychopathy. I've never found a workable solution to female histrionics (the Jake Gittes slap has been out of play for many decades now) and I sympathize with what sounds like a stupidly harrowing experience. A barfight would be less traumatic. Well except for that possibility of dying or being permanently maimed. No, maybe a barfight would've been worse.
In any case the only solution to this is personal resolve to keep moving forward and allowing time to do its thing. Avoid too low a profile. The current year ability to stay in ones room and get one's rocks off to a live thot (via camgirls, etc.) is toxic to real human interaction and I encourage you to eschew that route and stay out among humans as much as possible.
From the sound of it you've got something going on that is attractive to at least some females to whom you would be attractive. That's a good thing. Remember humor--that is to say finding humor in situations --is gold, if you can manage it. Humor both armors you and disarms your opponent.
You can't have a left-wing Joe Rogan because the next time he strays from the line on COVID or anything else, they'll get what Rogan got. Friedland has already had one brush with cancel culture for utterly inane reasons. He got past it because he was too small to be the priority target. Whoever sits in that spot will go down for something.
This whole discussion is a bunch of evangelicals sitting around trying to figure out why they can't make movies that appeal to outsiders while refusing to mention the mile-long faith statement and guidelines they need everyone working on the film to sign on to and the essential points of doctrine that must be squeezed in. There haven't been many good movies about Mohammed for a reason.
You can have a left-wing person who's at Joe's level. You can't have a left-wing Joe Rogan because Joe Rogan isn't a partisan warrior. That's how he got so big!
Even desiring a left-wing Rogan is telling on themselves. Not everyone sees their media consumption as a way to bring about the Kingdom. It's just more of the same: people need to be educated -> people resist and flee our spaces -> well, we should just colonize that outlet too so they have no escape. Doesn't work as well with new media.
TitaniumButterfly
3hr ago
The question here, really, is whether anti-abortionists are coming from a place of A) wishing punishment upon women for enjoying sex or B) concern for the resulting human lives.
Within this context the question of whether nascent humans should count as humans isn't being begged. It's established that this is the background belief of (almost all) anti-abortionists, which is what matters here.
Claiming that anti-abortionists just want to punish women is a weird sort of disbelief in the foreigner, I think. Indeed it seems to beg the question of whether we really care about the nascent lives involved, and it comes down on the side of 'no'.
Clementine
3hr ago
I assume your wife has already gone to a physical therapist specializing in women's pelvic floors, but just in case she hasn't I am mentioning it anyway as something she should try. Everyone knows about kegels but physical therapists can help suggest other exercises and help with doing kegels more effectively.
Not saying it will solve the problem entirely but it can lessen the severity/frequency for some women.
But there's more than two sides to this, I'd point out. There's a large contingent, maybe even a plurality, that believes that being born from parents who didn't want you sucks, that ideally children should only be born from parents that want them, that wouldn't care to defend considering a fetus a human being at the moment of conception, but ALSO wouldn't care to defend it only being a human being at the moment of birth. That contingent feels intuitively, even if they cannot articulate it with nice convenient lines, that there is a difference between an abortion days after conception and an abortion days before expected birth.
That contingent might be easier to compromise with. In fact, compromise is what they want, and usually get. Taking off the table some few but highly sympathetic exceptions might make them willing to go for a more restrictive compromise.
OracleOutlook
Fiat justitia ruat caelum
3hr ago
I think I qualify in the "urinary incontinence" bracket, but it's just when I have a very, very bad cold at a specific time of my cycle, and I'm able to wear a regular pad to deal with it. About as inconvenient as a period. This seems to be the most common version.
Tree
3hr ago
I didn't say it was stupid. It's no different than doing judo or boxing.
I don't think that being punched in the face is uniquely valuable as a teaching lesson, though.
I mean, look at your position ITT. Because you lack this formative experience of pain, you find the pain of labour to be unbearable, so you think it cannot be expected of anyone, thereby.... dooming humanity to extinction. No big deal, but in case you think saving humanity is valuable, then I recommend a punch in the face.
Clementine
3hr ago
Thank you for sharing your perspective!
And yes there is a joy that toddlers bring that doesn't really come from anything else. They're just so much more seriously and wholeheartedly enthusiastic about life than anyone else I've ever met.
Throwaway05
3hr ago
I'm sure they did (again assuming not BPD).
Imagine you thought you had two arms but you actually have three arms. You have two arms. "Has anyone ever told you have three arms?" "No why would they do that, I only have two arms."
What's that third arm then? "What third arm" "THAT ARM" "I don't know what you are talking about."
It's a delusion because you are convinced, which is why that shit is scary af.
Generally people with delusions will tell you matter of factly or you'll have to be careful about them coming out because "do you have any delusions" always gets "of course not."
DelendaEst
3hr ago
Nucleus Genomics just launched their "Nucleus Embryo" product yesterday, if you want to do IVF to get improved odds on the kid's genes. I'm not sure what their process is or how reliable it is, though.
That sounds pretty close to Gattaca unless I am missing something.
Clementine
3hr ago
Scott mentioned it at some point, I was curious and checked it out, and I've lurked occasionally since. So I've been lurking for a long time I guess? Because I don't remember when he mentioned it.
"Life being worth living" suggests that there is a person who would appreciate that life. Debate is out on whether the nascent brain activity of a fetus counts as a person.
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