janeerie
Normie quokka
User ID: 713
janeerie
1yr ago
I think this is what has bothered me most about the people rushing to defend Musk. It's "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" mindset, and it's quite silly. There is no need to pick a side here. Both Musk and the people getting hysterical about Musk are acting like children.
janeerie
1yr ago
This might vary depending on how much you generally identify with characters in movies/shows. I get really immersed when watching something, and that immersion gets stronger for characters who I feel similarity to. For example, if I'm watching a show where a woman is fighting, I feel it in my body. Watching a show where men are fighting, I'm just an observer.
The experience is just fundamentally different for me, aside from any political/societal concerns.
janeerie
1yr ago
Yes, I am very curious what the steelman argument is against such a practice. The speaker in their link seemed to be against surrogacy in general, so maybe that is the issue? Is it ok for two lesbians to have a baby?
janeerie
1yr ago
Online therapy services (like BetterHelp) are basically mental health fast food. I tried one because it was so convenient and cheap, and I quickly realized that my therapist was unlikely to tell me anything that had not already occurred to me.
I finally found a psych professor at the local university who sees a few patients on the side (I basically had to audition to get accepted). It's pretty damn expensive, but I'm getting much more out of it. I guess it's good that the fast food option exists for those who can't afford anything else, but I wonder how much people are getting out of it.
janeerie
1yr ago
I recently finished The Three-Body Problem and was left with a feeling of general annoyance. I'm fine with trilogies, but don't end a book just hanging in the middle of the story. You have to have some kind of mini arc! I read the plots of the second and third books on Wikipedia, and I think I'm done there.
Then I picked up Pnin by Nabokov. His writing tickles my brain in just the right way and makes me so happy.
janeerie
1yr ago
I feel the same way - there is a truly amazing experience that happens when you're in the middle of all those voices and getting in harmony with them. One thing that turns me off about choirs, though, is that often the directors like to do "difficult" music. I just want to sing, not struggle with my sight-reading skills.
janeerie
2mo ago
2 things: The first was realizing that I was approaching the world with the mindset that everybody hated me and thought I was a loser. I decided to pretend instead that everybody was my friend, and surprise surprise, people respond to that and I started to believe it myself. I flipped that switch when I was 17, and it still serves me well.
The second is less inspiring - an SSRI. I started taking if for panic and found it did wonders for my social anxiety also.
janeerie
3mo ago
I'm curious what your current job is? I think the best course would be to do something along those lines as a freelancer, but I suppose that's not possible for all professions.
My mom was a SAHM and did a lot of volunteer work, which I always thought would be a nice choice if I had to go that way. It can be a good way to pick up skills that will come in handy later.
janeerie
7mo ago
- Extroversion: 11
- Emotional stability: 52
- Agreeableness: 62
- Conscientiousness: 98
- Intellect/Imagination: 91
I am the queen of conscientiousness! Now please excuse me as I get back to organizing my pen collection.
janeerie
9mo ago
That's exactly it. I have a terrible fear of eternity and the infinite. Makes my mind want to crawl into a little hole and shut down.
janeerie
1yr ago
I would be interested in #4. I am in a divided marriage and I don't see many people even attempting it anymore. I was pregnant in 2016, which is probably the main thing that kept us together during the Trump madness.
janeerie
1yr ago
I agree that monopolistic competition is bad, which is why it's terrible that I can have one hospital in my city and their ER doesn't take insurance. What is the average person supposed to do in that situation? They can't shop around; they just have to eat whatever medical bill comes their way, on top of whatever they and their employer pay for insurance.
Emergency medicine is a place where the free market system really breaks down, and we need a different solution from what we have now. I don't know if the surprise billing legislation is the best situation, but what else is being proposed?
janeerie
1yr ago
I'm curious what is going on in your mind when you are feeling tense. Are there particular thoughts you keep returning to? How do you respond mentally when you have these feelings?
Anxiety feeds on itself, and one of the main drivers is rumination. Rumination is a choice and there are ways to train yourself away from it. You mention a lot of behaviors you are changing to deal with anxiety, but you might also want to think about thought processes you need to change.
janeerie
1yr ago
I am mystified that you can't reach your own butt! (I also don't keep tabs open)
janeerie
1yr ago
I do recall people complaining about Tom Cruise playing Jack Reacher in the movie, since the character is supposed to be a behemoth and Tom Cruise is more... petite. There was much celebration when the character in the TV show was played by a big guy.
janeerie
1yr ago
Agreed. Also, top level comments should not have the collapse bar on the left (we already have the expand/collapse icon). It's very difficult right now to find the beginning of new topics.
janeerie
12d ago
I fear I'm making this sound worse than it is. I really don't have to do anything for her; it just annoys me that she is wasting her life while other lives are too short (my own mom died when she was 45). If things do get to the point where she requires actual physical care, I plan to bring in the professionals and give my sisters-in-law the primary responsibility.
She's actually from Utah, where we live now. We moved here a couple of years ago so she could be close to her daughters who all live here. She does get a bit misty when we visit the local steakhouse :D
janeerie
27d ago
Oh, I'm so happy for you! I've always enjoyed your posts, and I'm glad you now have more time to dwell on other thoughts, rather than exams. It seems you get down on yourself at times, and I hope this gives you a boost of confidence.
janeerie
27d ago
I'm the same - I enjoyed it for a couple of years in college and then it just became a panic attack trigger. I'm always amazed that some people are able to use it as a treatment for anxiety.
janeerie
6mo ago
It's funny - there are many women who are offended by the very idea of artificial wombs, to the point where I think it's a minority position to be ok with them. I have a hard time understanding that.
janeerie
7mo ago
Yoshi's Crafted World has a great co-op mode. My son and I played it a lot when he was around 4, and he then moved onto just playing by himself. There are also good Kirby co-op games, like Kirby and the Forgotten Land. Basically, a Nintendo Switch is going to get you pretty far.
janeerie
8mo ago
It's not anonymous, which means everybody treats each other as human and there's more of a sense of a community. I'd say the overarching mood is anti-woke, but there's no lockstep thinking and any disagreement is done with respect. Also, while there is a good amount of culture war discussion, any topic is welcome and gets decent engagement.
Not sure where you live, but there are also in-person meetups (along with the official Unspeakeasy retreats).
janeerie
8mo ago
Yeah, it seems to be quite a bit easier for widowers to remarry, and they are more motivated to remarry than widows. My best friend and I both lost our mothers when we were young and our dads quickly remarried—I think because they wanted someone to take care of the kids. I'd be surprised if single fathers are even really a thing.
Hi, I'm your wife.
Well, not really, but you sound just like my husband. I don't assign him tasks because he's not my child, but I hate that I have to do most things myself.
Why don't you just do stuff when it needs to be done? It's very easy to say "It doesn't need to be done now; I'll get to it later." My father-in-law does this all the time also. But then these things never actually get done. As with the example of the plane tickets, the sooner you buy them the better, so you should do it as soon as your travel plans are finalized.
It seems you understand this and the real question is how to make yourself do things, but the only answer to that is to just do them. I'm very curious why this is a stumbling block. Do you think of tasks and just have other things you'd rather do? How important are those other things? Do you just forget about tasks (in which case you need to be ok with your wife reminding you)?
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