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PaperclipPerfector  20hr ago (text post)   580 thread views

Friday Fun Thread for February 6, 2026

Be advised: this thread is not for serious in-depth discussion of weighty topics (we have a link for that), this thread is not for anything Culture War related. This thread is for Fun. You got jokes? Share 'em. You got silly questions? Ask 'em.

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Want to fly farther?

Get that dick up, king <-- This is a link.

TLDR;

Ski jumpers, ahead of the winter Olympics (which begin, officially, today!) have, allegedly, been inflating their penises via various methods in order to expand the surface area of their ski jumping suits during official fitting.

After they've de-cocked, so to speak, the extra suit material acts as a small "sail" and they stay aloft just a bit longer.

Anything for an edge, I guess. This leaves me to mourn mostly for whichever ski jumper is legitimately packing a howitzer downstairs. That poor fellow will probably have a room full of scrutinizing IOC eyeballs on his Johnson.

Any other good sports cheating stories like this?

Can't you do the same with, I don't know, your chest or belly? Why it has to be the penis?

And, of course, how hilarious would be the countermeasures? Are they all going to have their penises inspected before the jump now? Or maybe required weekly inspections for a year before the event, to establish the baseline and prevent the anomalous inflation?

Or maybe required weekly inspections for a year before the event, to establish the baseline and prevent the anomalous inflation?

If there isn't a "Norwegian Penis Inspection Team" t-shirt, there should be.

I feel like it would be less hassle to take a heroic dose of viagra and then think of England.

How are they fitting the suits? Couldn't the athletes just stuff a sock down there rather than inject paraffin into their cocks? Or are the suits fitted during penis inspection day?

Or are the suits fitted during penis inspection day?

It's this one.

The rule is the crotch of the suit is based on the bottom of your genitals. So, bigger genitals, longer suit, and bigger wing. The point is you can't wear a squirrel suit, and so there are rules about how big and webbed the suit can be. Exactly this big, depending.

This seems ACTUALLY unfair to guys who are growers not showers.

Seems like they should probably standardize something regarding the uniforms here to make it so jump length isn't so directly correlated with junk length.

Wouldn't it be the opposite? The grower could get aroused for the fitting and experience significant shrinkage when he gets out into the cold air.

Or pick the largest junk and set everyone else's to that length.

And have everyone competing to be the guy that sets the standard?

I feel like Goodhart's law would become a problem real quick LMAO.

This seems ACTUALLY unfair to guys who are growers not showers.

Shouldn't be a problem unless you're chuffing before the jump.

DO YOU NOT?

That poor fellow will probably have a room full of scrutinizing IOC eyeballs on his Johnson

That poor soul having to endure a room of people staring at his giant penis. Truly the stuff of nightmares.

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