The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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I've been sober since December, but I think I might start drinking once a week again in order to improve my social life. I've made some progress at sober socializing, but then I got to a plateau where I started losing interest/motivation. The people I meet IRL aren't interested in having deep conversations about the things I'm interested in, and navigating modern conversation norms is exhausting.
Can you prevent most of the long-term damage from alcohol by boosting glutathione to quickly break down the acetaldehyde?
How effective is this supplement stack at preventing the negative effects of alcohol?
Before drinking: emoxypine, milk thistle, S-Acetyl L-Glutathione
After drinking: Dihydromyricetin, Pyroglutamic Acid, Succinic Acid
"I gave up drinking, but I'm so smart I can't have conversations with the normies" isn't the vibe you want to give off, my guy.
Turn it into a game - learn how to do the normie conversation dance and get good enough at it you can lead them to having the "deeper" conversations you value. The major up front caveat here is that "deep" conversations can, and should, be about whatever topic BOTH parties are interested in. Don't be that guy who just steers conversation toward whatever your thing is. That's selfish. Everyone craves these "deep" conversations but a lot of people think "deep" only counts if its their preferred flavor of "deep."
But, let's go ahead and think of the bigger (deeper?) picture -
All conversation is valuable if you want it to be. Small talk is underappreciated and over-maligned. Small talk shows you can have easy, non-weighty conversation with all types of people and not DEMAND up front commitment to a three hour navel gazing session. In fact, conversation among close friends is 99% small talk but with shared references and values that make it highly enjoyable. If you really want to try to convince me you aren't guilty of slinging memes back and forth with your besties, I'll believe you on this holy internet forum of honesty - but will you believe yourself?
Small-talk is people trying to let you in for the deeper stuff while guarding themselves. If you can't tolerate that then they are absolutely right in not wanting to talk to you.
Finally, and I mean this charitably, take a second to decide if what you really want is to have a conversation with another unique human .... or to have an audience.
I can do small talk and sometimes even get a bit of enjoyment from it. The problem IRL is that many people's beliefs are so intertwined with their politics. If I talk about something completely unrelated to politics they might bring up progressive stack concepts as a way to discount a source.
I do talk about things they are interested in too, but they aren't interested my truth-seeking style of discussing the topic. I like to pull in a lot of data, consider all sides of an argument, and explore the topic in novel ways. Most IRL people seem to just want the social confirmation/validation of their deep thoughts instead of wanting to think in a scientist/rationalist adjacent style.
The thing is I've found online spaces where I can talk about deep things in a way all participants enjoy. We use our real names and do video conferencing. So some of this is specifically me being frustrated by IRL people because they are so different than my far away friends that I talk to virtually.
Sometimes I'll watch a podcast where 2 people get deep dialogue on a subject. I'd like to be participating in conversations like those without being on a podcast.
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Consider taking Nicotinamide mononucleotide, which has other beneficial effects, and some evidence it alleviates hangover symptoms.
https://share.snipd.com/chapter/8e9f4c1a-d114-4a37-bda3-83fa86288771
I can anecdotally report that I have not had a serious hangover after drinking since I started supplementing with this.
That's interesting. I do sometimes take NAD+ precursors, but I never realized that it might help prevent hangovers.
It makes sense if NAD+ precursors could, e.g. improve liver function, that it would improve alcohol tolerance and processing.
Gotta be careful not to use this as an excuse to drink more heavily, though.
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Can't you just drink a little less? Most of the time I'm out socialising I limit myself to 3-5 pints as to avoid or limit hangover. Just get a mild buzz and stop there.
How often are you out in social settings where you're expected to drink anyway? For me it's like 1-2 times a week tops. I might be older than you and have different obligations but I cant remember a period of my life when there was so much social drinking ecpected of me that it became a health issue since I was like 19-20.
When I drink I aim for .05-.08 BAC, but sometimes I'll get as high as .1 BAC. I have a series of controls in places to make sure I stick to that that when drinking. I don't get hangovers. I just want to limit negative effects as much as a I can. I have noticed that certain parts of memory (like word recall) feel a bit worse as I've gotten older and I don't want alcohol to exacerbate any memory issues.
I'm not in many social settings where I'm expected to drink and I know how to politely decline alcohol in these settings. The issue is more that drinking gets into a playful mood and allows me to practice humor and different ways of being charismatic. When I don't drink for long periods of time I start to lose my interest in socializing and the more creative/playful parts of me get weaker, which makes it harder to connect with people.
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Honestly? Anyone who has a problem with your sobriety simply isn't worth your time to begin with. An actual friend is going to support you if you're trying to remain sober. Don't take up drinking again just to try to get along better with those losers.
Almost everyone I know supports my sobriety. I have a few friends that say things like, "we miss seeing you at the bar it is more fun when you're here", but that is no big deal.
This issue is more that alcohol allows me to get into a playful state that makes socializing fun. If I stay sober for long periods of time my interest in socializing goes down and I tend to get fixated on special interests. I get bored with IRL conversations because nobody wants to have deep conversations or talk much about the things that I find interesting.
I think a lot of users on this forum would run into that problem eventually.
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Ah, I misunderstood. Unfortunately I don't have any advice I can give on that one, as that isn't something I have ever struggled with. I definitely don't think drinking is the answer here, but I'm not sure what is.
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I had good results with n acetyl cysteine during and after drinking. I'd say it reduced the strength of hangovers by 30%.
Edit: One month later, I'm adding a study.
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Just drink bro. Everything good that has happened to me has been a result of drinking. The only thing that really helps is if you want to take charcoal pills. But that just makes it so you can drink more without a hangover. 85% of the people on this forum are interesting high IQ shut-ins that wouldn't know what to do with a vodka shot if it spat in their face.
It makes TV and movies 10x better. It makes conversation 3x easier. It is all around a huge life enhancer. After about 1.5 to 3 drinks you'll be in the "Ballmer peak" where you are actually smarter, more coordinated and much more charming than you are with zero alcohol.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=VTSCppeFzX4?si=TMUu96ErWVwaP2X6
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I kind of hate that I like myself better when I'm 2 drinks in, and suddenly social situations are 'easy' to navigate, I'm more witty and charming and let slights roll of me without a care.
If alcohol didn't cause all those other health problems in the long term, I'd probably keep myself in a constant state of light inebriation except when I really needed to call on my self-control.
There's actual tech devoted towards curing hangovers danger now which would certainly remove some of the reluctance.
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Yeah, that's what happens when you just drink.
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The other replies are exactly what you'd expect.
Absurd to pretend like food and TV isn't sometimes improved with alcohol. Or that the ballmer peak of sociability doesn't exist.
Or that drinking until you're hungover is a requirement? All these supplements, when a pickle, 2 cups of water, and ibuprofen, will completely solve your problem.
Yup. It is like this here and on slatestar. Bunch of tea totalers. Social drinking would solve 80% of the "I'm lonely" posts.
Between that and acting like getting into a fist fight is mortal danger, I sometimes feel like I've been beamed to another planet.
Yup I've had 2 replies already that have straight up called me an alcoholic for suggesting drinking might be fun and improve your enjoyment of certain activities. Which it 100% without a doubt does. Same people would probably think I'm suicidal for skiing without a helmet or picking fights when the singing is done on south bank of the Liffey. Life is for living. Not sneering.
I feel sorry for people that don't drink, because when they wake up in the morning, that is the best they are going to feel all day-” ― Frank Sinatra/Dean Martin
No, people called you an alcoholic because you suggested drinking as a solution to someone's problems. Which I think is harsh but I get it. If someone needs alcohol to enjoy activities, then that's a strong sign of alcoholism.
I said they make them better and more enjoyable. He said he wanted to start drinking again to have more enjoyable interactions. I think it is a good idea. No one said anything about need. I was just pointing out what billions of people know already. Alcohol makes a lot of stuff more fun. Apparently that is a trigger in online rationalist adjacent spaces.
I mean I disagree with the idea that alcohol makes things more fun, as I said in another comment. But even if I did think that was true, I think that while you might not need alcohol to enjoy life, it's still bad advice to tell someone "hey if you aren't enjoying life you should drink". Because in that case, the person you are talking to would wind up needing alcohol to enjoy life and that's a terrible thing.
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How does that solve the long term problems, i.e. significantly increased risks of all sorts of illnesses?
I think drinking 2-3 times a week is absolutely worth the cost, from all the articles I've read.
I make the same decision about Philly Cheesesteaks and fast food.
If you're maximizing longevity of life over quality, that's a valid decision, but I've never been interested in that.
Fair, but I'll just add: Longevity is likely to affect quality, too. Low quality years marred by sickness are likely to come sooner and take up more of your lifespan if you haven't respected your health.
I agree with you there, too.
Alcohol is the opposite of a wonder drug. I've drank it 5 days a week and 0, and the latter is preferable. Especially as I age, I see it's role as far more minor in my life.
All that being said, some of the best nights of my life have involved it as a central theme. The best relationships have had it greasing the skids. The most delicious foods have been complimented by some form of alcohol. Those of you who are eschewing it completely while your body can handle the downsides of the toxin may be missing out on more than a bit. I don't think a drug lasts this long and has such a stranglehold on our species for 0 reason.
My experience with alcohol is completely different. I will not offer studies and data but only my personal anedcotes - my "lived experience" if I may.
I find even the smell of alcohol nauseating and I had never tasted alcohol until 18 despite the Italian legal age being 16. Due to this I've gotten drunk only once and it was an experience that I can descrive only as the one of the most horrible things that I've ever happened to me. It was not the hangover that upset me so much as the emotional state that alcohol provoked. It turns out that alcohol makes me really really depressed, in a very existential way: I start to think about how everything is useless and life is ultimately meaningless and worthless. On one hand, this is what I actually think, on the other hand these thoughts generally stay in a way analytical, cold part of my mind; alcohol makes me feel these thoughts, they become emotions: the terror, the despair, the feeling of the Nothingness that was, is and will be beyond. It was terrifying. For me it was a "Never again" moment.
As with everything, I think there is a strong genetic component in people reactions to alcohol.
For sure. And, for what it's worth, despite being an advocate of 2-5 drinks (depending on body weight and tolerance) I also get unbelievably morose and existential beyond that.
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IDK man. I drink occasionally, and I disagree that it actually makes food taste better or makes relationships better. I drink because I enjoy the taste of some drinks, not because it actually enhances other things.
Red wine with chicken parm, and white with piccata? Bourbon with Conecuh or steak? A beer before barbecue? Margaritas and burritos? We're talking about our individual palates at one level, but these are classic pairings.
For relationships, alcohol is an intimacy accelerator. When you only have one night to get someone's attention, it's incredibly valuable. Most people aren't capable of talking deeply about philosophy or what they need from a relationship within 5 minutes of meeting you, in fact, it's creepy unless you've had a drink or two.
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I agree that it can have real upsides. I drink a couple of units sometimes, like with a gourmet meal or when meeting a friend I haven't seen in a while. It's just the habit that I want to remain free of. Better to wait for the right occasion, and then drink something especially delicious, than to try to use alcohol to create an occasion. :)
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Maybe for deeply addicted alcoholics unable to function without their fix.
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Spoken like an alcoholic, to be honest. It does not necessarily make TV or movies better. You're just using it to adjust your mood. You get your fix, you feel happy, you get in the flow of enjoying stuff. Thinking you're smarter while significantly inebriated is very much an illusion too. It wrecks any complex thinking, while making you think it doesn't. Your conversation will flow easier, sure, but discerning people will identify you as a faucet.
It's better IMO to put down the emotional/mental baggage that hinders your enjoyment of sober life instead of relying on an unhealthy crutch... This is not to say that people should never drink, but it should be done more deliberately, and less, rather than reaching to it several times per week as a fix or 'enhancement'.
Kinda harsh man. Sounds like you could use a beer.
If you're wasted out of your gourd then yes you'll be annoying to be around. But a night out with friends, office party, a wedding or a thanksgiving meal are all a ton more fun when the booze is flowing, even a deep chat with a best pal you only see once a year is better when you've both had a few drams of whisky. I'm sorry that hasn't been your experience. My comment was about OP deciding to drink once a week while socializing. You really think agreeing with that sentiment makes someone an alcoholic?
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