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PaperclipPerfector  26d ago (text post)   1516 thread views

Wellness Wednesday for July 22, 2026

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

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I love beans, but I live in an area with incredibly hard water. So far the only option I've found is to use water from the store if I don't want leather-skinned beans. Baking soda works, but it messes with the flavor and texture.

Does anybody here have a better solution?

It is possible to install a water-softening machine, acting either on the entire house's water intake or just on a single faucet.

  • Educational pages: 1 2

  • Commercial pages: 1 2

I've looked at water softeners, but I've had a lot of people warn me that they'll obliterate older copper and cast iron pipes because the protective limescale will dissolve. Is there anything to that, or is it an old wives' tale?

Manufacturers' manuals (1 2) indicate that reverse-osmosis systems can make water acidic enough to corrode copper pipes. But water softening is not reverse osmosis.

This document from a (biased) trade association cites studies conducted by the US EPA and the UK Water Treatment Association for the conclusion that water softeners do not increase corrosion in copper and steel pipes. It also says that lime scale does not protect against corrosion.

What is it you're after, btw? Dating apps seem calibrated for hookups. If you want marriage material it may be better to look elsewhere.

EDIT: Sincere apologies. Responded to wrong post somehow. I'm very sorry.

I assume you meant to reply to me. I want someone who will go on a date with me.

And there's nowhere else to look. At speed dating, three women said I was the "most normal" guy there who they had the best conversation with; No matches. I tried going to a board game singles event; the gender ratio was 3:1 and the only games they had were Uno and Jenga. I tried volunteering to clean up the park; all trannies. The only women who participate in my hobbies view straight men as defective gay men. I've forgotten what it feels like to be interested in a woman; all they ever do is snarl about Data Centers or ICE when they're not praising some piece of media for its Queer themes, it's all become supremely boring to me.

I got a lot of mileage out of classical choir and west coast swing

Oh yeah, modern women do generally seem to be a lost cause. I found mine through church. Cheerfully cooks and cleans while perpetually proudly pregnant. Happy to be a woman. Thinks politics is for me to worry about. Loves me and makes sure my home is nice to come back to after work. Highly recommend -- but don't think her expectations for me aren't at least commensurate.

'ate carrots. 'ate lentils. Simple as.

I kept some of the bean water and I am debating seeing if I can turn it into meringue like you can with garbanzo bean water. How weird would that be?

Aquafaba. Vegans can be so creative I had no idea this was a thing.

Mediocre gravy is still gravy. Way I see it, there's only two real ways to mess up gravy: flour and heat. Clumped, burned, or undercooked in the roux. Afterwards, the world is your oyster. Worcestershire, rich drippings, or try hardcore po'dunk mode with diced chicken gizzard.

Too much salt can definitely be a problem.

One of the more useful pieces of advice from Chef John, along with "we don't let the food win" and "you've got to flip with confidence for it to work" is "hot roux, cold milk - no lumps". Works every time.

I love carrot and radish salad: grate or julienne both vegetables, add your favorite salad oil, salt and pepper. Still quite filling while being light. Radish can be replaced with kohlrabi.

Just an update/journal/vent. Im 5 days into a 1-week subscription to HingeX, with new photos that are 40lbs lighter, having progressively swiped through every profile in a 1, then 2, then 3, et-cetera-mile radius, until I'm looking at Chicago's entire West side. I try to send comments most of the time. I don't bother liking anyone with their Instagram listed or who's obviously too hot.

Advanced filters: No one with politics listed as "Other", around here that can really only mean Marxist or Hard Leftist, many of the people who list themselves as "Liberal" also have a prompt demanding that anyone who messages them be a Leftist. Already saw a profile that mostly talked about how dreamy Mamdani is, to add to the "Hasan Piker is so dreamy" pile of Things That If I Had Not Seen I Would Hate The World Less.

Absolutely zero interaction. Getting flaked on or stood up won't wind up being a problem, it turns out.

No one with politics listed as "Other", around here that can really only mean Marxist or Hard Leftist

How so? Has the public opinion pendulum swung so hard the other way that you can't say you're leftist in polite conpany?

🤨 No. The public opinion here is apparently that if you're not a Leftist, you are a bad person and therefore unworthy of her vagina. No woman is afraid of driving away men with her politics.

The options for politics on Hinge are Liberal, Conservative, Moderate, Not Political, and Other.

Based on the little jabs I see on Hinge from women, they disapprove of men who list their politics as Not Political, because how can you be apolitical when there's a Nazi in the Whitehouse, ICE Ghestappo in the streets, ACAB, BLM, Trans Genocide Palestinian Genocide et cetera.

Some people who identify as Leftist just see it as being a good liberal. Other leftists are in the "liberals get the bullet too" camp where they hate the DNC, so calling themselves liberal feels yucky, thus "Other." They might be playing that stupid game where they pretend they have to hide their power level, but that's like claiming to be an oppressed Christian in Alabama.

IIRC Hinge doesn't have a "leftist" option.

I don't bother liking anyone with their Instagram listed or who's obviously too hot.

The first one I get. The second seems like selling yourself short. You know what they say about shooting for the moon.

I've been treated with contempt by quite plain women, I see no reason to burden attractive ones with my attention.

I don't doubt your version of events, and the following advice may come off as condescending, but it would be remiss of me not to mention it anyway: in people of either sex, bitterness and self-pity are some of the least sexy traits going. No one is going to want to fuck you if you come off as bitter over past dating experiences, or feel sorry for yourself.

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Knowing it is one thing – acting on that knowledge is quite another.

At some point in the last few months, without ceremony or consent, I became the most responsible person in my family. There was no coronation. Responsibility in families obeys a conservation law: it never disappears, it just migrates toward whoever flinches last. My parents are getting old and fretful. My brother, now that med school has stopped supplying its ambient excitement, is possibly mildly depressed, and his relationship of five years has come apart in his hands. Seeing it coming didn't dull the pain.

All of which culminated in my vacation falling apart, and me frantically darning it back together. He didn't apply for his visa in time; then, at our parents' gentle nudging, he postponed the whole thing to September. How kind of everyone involved. It's not as if I needed that vacation myself. I was fucking counting on those two weeks to undo several months of pure misery, which, granted, is a lot to ask of two weeks. I was asking anyway.

So I coped. I spent time in Glasgow, which I've warmed to; I can see myself living there in the long run, and God knows the demand for psychiatrists exists. I went to Loch Lomond, which is absolutely gorgeous, and overrun with tourists trailing dogs and small children, a combination calculated to make my heart ache. I ended up in Pitlochry, realized I'd left my keys behind, and did something I'd always meant to do and never had: backpacking.

Or an approximation thereof. I crashed at a hostel, despite being able to afford an actual hotel without checking my balance. Mixed experience. The kids were all on their phones. I looked comprehensively out of place, dressed in work-adjacent clothing and boots never designed for hiking. I could not have given less of a fuck.

I didn't sleep well. My bunkmate has an INCREDIBLY clingy nephrologist girlfriend, who began video calling him at eight in the morning. Ringer on. He slept through it. I did not. She kept this up for fifty minutes, per my watch. I silenced several calls. I tried to shake him awake and failed; the man was auditioning for the morgue. I considered throwing his phone in the bin and, in a display of restraint that should count toward my revalidation, relented.

Eventually I picked up the fucking phone myself and informed her that her boyfriend was not dead, merely doing a very good job acting like it, and that she might be better served dating an ENT specialist who could address the hearing loss, or someone from GI who could work up the clonazepam autobrewery syndrome he had evidently developed. She sounded understanding, or at least relieved to hear a male voice, then immediately pivoted to texting him, with a follow-up call ten minutes later. He did apologize at some point. I have forgiven him, because his life is clearly its own punishment.

I believe I've mentioned a cute Dutch doctor before. The one I was rather confident had a crush on me. With my tolerance for workplace drama being what it is, I'd kept things strictly platonic, barring some barely contained wheezing at her accidental innuendo. My Emotional Support Lesbian (asexual) had long lobbied for me to make a move. I always declined, explaining that I knew perfectly well my reluctance was downstream of a bad inferiority complex and a healthy impostor syndrome, and that knowing this did precisely nothing to dissolve it. Insight, as I tell my patients, is necessary but not sufficient.

She rotated to a different department, but I saw her again before she left. She got to see me doing much better than I'd been when we first met. Without going into detail, I managed to pay down some of the enormous mental debt I felt I owed her. It's a very good story, it really is, and I can't be arsed to write it. I returned favors. I was there for her on the day the NHS cracked even her armor. And we ended up on what even the most self-loathing, insecure version of me couldn't classify as anything other than a date, accidentally on purpose. Four hours. I could practically feel the ionizing radiation as she assessed me for husband material, and, unless I've badly misread the dosimetry, found me to her liking. Not the first sign, either, unless someone wants to tell me that Dutch women casually announce "It's such a shame that men are scared away by competent, career-oriented women" while you're mid-bite of a sandwich. I choked slightly. As I've always said: true of many men, but not me.

I hadn't expected to see her again, and I'd already gotten the platonic farewells out of the way, wishing her well on a career that plainly requires no blessing from me. She is very good at her job. Good enough that I genuinely wondered what the fuck I'd been doing at her age. I got better at some point, is my defense.

I will probably not move ahead with it, and it hurts to write that sentence. I have nothing against women with careers; I just watched myself fall for one. What I have is a finite battery and a realistic model of what it means to love someone who lives at a hundred miles an hour and fits more into an evening than I do into half a week. Distance. Rotational placements. I might be able to keep up. I'm not sure I have the energy to find out. I did have the energy to write 9000+ words about her that evening, because that is the only way I know how to process anything: I pin the longing to the page, next to the pain, where neither can hurt me on the move.

All I can say is that I said and did the things that the SMH of three months ago, that shivering, scared and sorry bastard, had wished he could say and do. I'd like to promise there will be no regrets. I'll settle for reporting that I took the worst of them out back with a shovel and came home alone. I've never been one to hope too hard for second chances (a lie), and I got one I could never have dreamed of. It's a considered decision. It is also a painful one; the two categories overlap far more often than anyone admits. I hope she finds what she's looking for: a family, a farm and a future. And at least she leaves with my link to a LessWrong essay on embryo preservation, plus my own comment underneath. I am exactly that kind of nerd.

It's a very good story, it really is, and I can't be arsed to write it.

Tease.

To be fair, I have written the story. Every detail of that day, somewhere in the ballpark of 9600 words. The problem is that it is too personal, and making it safe or suitable for public consumption would take an enormous amount of time.

Hey, at least I was coaxed into spilling one of the more cinematic moments. There was so much, that day, it took at least 5 hours to cover most of it. Why? I forget. Human memory is imprecise. I wanted to capture what I felt in the heat of the moment. I am, despite my best efforts, a romantic. And I'm very good at missing opportunities and then making up for it the first chance I get.

I get it, no, really, I do, but those of us that are interested in such things are left hanging. Good for you for actually writing it out at least.

I'm sorry. I recall seeing your comment, but I lacked the context for a proper response. I suppose the title of the book is all the context I really need, unless you want to talk about it. I hope you figure things out, and find someone new, who is better for you.

I get why you wouldn't want to air your private laundry is what I'm trying to get at, not trying to threadjack you here.

But you're still a tease. =P

Let me summarize this for you:

  • You lament your romantic failures, having consistently hit the wrong quadrant of the hot/crazy matrix.
  • You are filled with longing seeing children and dogs.
  • You're rapidly aging out of the part of the dating pool where good women, let alone good mothers, can be found.
  • The good Lord, in his infinite mercy, sends you a cute Dutch doctor who wants a family and a farm.

You're walking away from this?

My brother in Christ this is the one you'll regret letting get away. A sober, frugal Dutch doctor who wants a farm and a family, and you're passing on this because she's too organized? You're not supposed to "keep up" with her! You're supposed to complement each other! You're not internet semi-famous for nothing, and that charm and turn of phrase makes her feel as insecure as her conscientiousness makes you feel. You could walk away from this, and a few years from now as you age into dating divorcees, you'll look at the grippy-socks/grippy-box mistakes you've made, and feel that sudden zero-g free fall feeling of regret.

I almost let a good woman go for the same reason: I was insecure she would keep charging ahead, and I could barely keep my phone charged. (plus I was enjoying my own grippy-socks/grippy-box decisions). But I didn't, and kid number three is slowing mom down enough that I can just about keep up.

Don't walk, run back to her, with as grandly romantic a gesture as her Northern European temperament and the rules of the NHS HR department will allow.

I'm grateful, I really am. All I can promise is that this is a considered decision, and I haven't cut things off.

I will note that I'm not as old as you seem to think I am. Far from it. I'm in my late 20s. I intend to bite the bullet in the next 2 or 3 years, 5 max. I'm quite far from worrying about only having the leftovers of the dating pool at hand, and I keep that a live concern.

I may or may not have fractured my thumb, so I'll keep it brief.

A sober, frugal Dutch doctor who wants a farm and a family, and you're passing on this because she's too organized?

She's not "too organized", I might be lacking in that regard, but I'm not scared off by people who have their shit together. She's too busy, I think. She's intent on entering a brutal specialty for further training, and she's moved/moving to a different city. Not too far, by itself, but in conjunction I'd be surprised if I saw her more than once every other week for the next few years. Even worse if either of us seek a competitive job later, which might require serious geographical upheaval.

I don't want to make demands of her. It's one thing to make those adjustments when you're engaged or married, and it's another to enter a relationship like that. You probably don't understand what an absolute pain in the ass rotational training is, especially when both parties are doctors. She clearly loves her career, and is visibly worried about how that'll impact having a family. I don't go around giving IVF advice for nothing, she's well aware of the health risks of delaying pregnancy, and my impression is that she wants to hold off for a good while.

You're not supposed to "keep up" with her!

True story: I was walking her back to a party, which she had delayed going to for the said 4 hours. We took a shortcut through a uni campus. I was a few steps behind.

"SMH! You walk awfully slow for someone with such long legs."

"I used to run everywhere, once. These days, I'm older. I like to linger and smell the roses."

She raised an eyebrow, "I don't see any roses."

I shrugged. "It's a metaphor, I'm not hallucinating." I sniffed a flower of uncertain taxonomy.

"I thought you'd keep up." She declared, walking off at speed, looking back over her shoulder with a smile.

"I'm still here, am I not?" I resumed chasing her at my own pace. One step behind.

No, she does want someone who keeps up. I can keep up. I'm just tired, sometimes, very often. I'm not too far from taking a stand, digging in my heels, and declaring this is where I'll live now. I just want it to be where I want to be.

You're not internet semi-famous for nothing, and that charm and turn of phrase makes her feel as insecure as her conscientiousness makes you feel.

I genuinely don't think that's the case. I'm not insecure that she, in her chosen field, is visibly more competent. I'm good at my job. She told me she appreciates that. I can pick up on the insecurities she does have: her body, the tension between her career goals and her craving for a family. I don't contribute to these.

I almost let a good woman go for the same reason: I was insecure she would keep charging ahead, and I could barely keep my phone charged. (plus I was enjoying my own grippy-socks/grippy-box decisions). But I didn't, and kid number three is slowing mom down enough that I can just about keep up.

I'm glad you got the happy ending. I'm quite sure I'll get mine too. Say hi to the kids and the missus for me.

Don't walk, run back to her, with as grandly romantic a gesture as her Northern European temperament and the rules of the NHS HR department will allow.

We don't work together any more. But if I see her (big if), I'll bring a bouquet of roses, and ask her to smell them while I stand by and grin like a loon.

My power went out on Sunday at about 8:30 PM and was out until 3 AM. The entire street was pitch black because the transformers in town got knocked out by a severe thunderstorm that came and went in under 30 minutes.

Lights in the house:

  • my phone (other phones were low on charge and could not be used for long)
  • two OLight Mini 2s (very useful! marginally brighter than my phone's flashlight)
  • decently bright thin rectangular flashlight
  • an oil lamp

Observations:

  • I went out to check on the neighbors a little ways in, and went along the sidewalk to look closer at a fallen tree, and unwittingly I walked in between two downed power lines. Was this a failure of situational awareness, failure to have a bright enough flashlight, or just plain bad luck? The town guys came to look at the damage, and the first guy investigating had a flashlight that was very bright and could light up almost a whole block. The OLight Mini 2 is useful, but its capabilities are limited.
  • I really could have used something that could light up an entire room in the house. If I had that, we probably wouldn't have needed the oil lamp. I consider oil lamps to be fire hazards. But they're really useful fire hazards. The kerosene provides a light for a long time.
  • Having a nice, organized room helps you find stuff in it even when it's dark. I did not have a clean, organized room.
  • The power going out is a good excuse to play card games. Or do the exercise that you were putting off, supposing the exercise wasn't with powered equipment.
  • Surge protectors are good investments.
  • It occurred to me that the house was uniquely vulnerable, and I didn't have any loaded pistols at that time, and loading in the dark would be awkward. I have a "nightstand gun" with a flashlight, but you typically don't have that in a holster. What I realized was that I could have used a pistol that had a flashlight that could fit in a holster so I could just put it on "just in case" when the power goes out. But I don't know anything about holsters. I have one holster for my CZ P10-C, but if I put a flashlight on the gun, it wouldn't fit in the holster.
  • Sleeping was difficult because they were chainsawing a fallen tree through the night and obviously the white noise fans I have need power. Also it was pretty hot and humid without air conditioning.

I watched a Paul Harrell video about three-day-survival-packs, and he showed this product, and I realized that such a device would have been pretty useful for a power outage. I'm weighing that, a very bright and long-reaching flashlight, and certain weapon attachments due to the power outage. Likely, I'll get all that and then the next power outage will come and I'll find I didn't think of something else, too.

Apparently many people just start up their generators when this happens. Meh.

OLight Mini 2 bright enough flashlight

I am no flashlight autist, but this flashlight is like little babby. Clearly not up to the task of making the rounds outside. My current general purpose house flashlight-at-hand is a COAST XP11R (cheaper on Amazon.) I forget if I got it as a gift or if I purchased it, but I've had it for a couple years and have been pleased. Great flood of light for seeing where you're going while walking down a dark road or checking the back yard, with an adjustable beam that reaches a more than acceptable distance. Handy enough to stick inside a man's pocket, though obviously not as handy as little babby light. It comes with a USB-C rechargeable lithium ion battery and the option to slot in alkaline AAA's if you prefer.

Yes on working holster if you have a common light there's probably a ready-made option for your CZ. Yes on hand cranked radio all-in-one doohickey. It's probably junk but it only needs to work for one serious outage to be useful, so why not? Yes on having generator but precluding its use except for A Real Emergency. Is it worth having a generator you rarely if ever use? I don't know, I'm not a philosopher. The power is out and you aren't supposed to have wifi with the power is out. The freezer meat can't be allowed to go bad, but you are supposed to play cards in dimly lit rooms.

Lol thanks for the flashlight recommendation. Recommendations like that are part of why I posted. I guess I also wanted to hear other preparedness, or failures to prepare, that other people had. That flashlight looks pretty great without spending like a hundred bucks because you want the BEST flashlight possible.

Looking more into it, yeah, that radio is probably junk. Apparently the crank is a weak point on crank radios. I guess if I wanted a doohickey like that, there might be better stuff. I'll have to look into it some more. Or maybe I'll just buy that flashlight and forget about the rest of it.

Don't get me wrong I have an even junkier doohickey crank radio around somewhere. Although the fact I can't immediately go and look at it should tell you my level of preparedness versus a legend such as Paul Harrell. I haven't regretted forgetting about the doohickey.

A good opportunity to inform folks around here about step potential. In short, downed power lines can still be energized, and walking by can cause current to flow through one leg and out the other.

You can get holsters for guns with lights, but it generally needs to be specific to your gun + light. There are some universals like the Omnivore, but in my experience you're better off ordering the correct holster from a reputable semi-custom shop. For duty holsters, Safariland is something like the industry standard.

I keep a gunbelt that both my nightstand safe guns fit into, one with a light, one without. The downside here is cost, as a good holster is $80-200, and a full gunbelt rig three to five hundred. The joy of Glocks is that all four of my carry and competition guns fit into the same holster, with or without lights and optics, so I only needed the one.

Surge protectors are good investments.

Or uninterruptible power supplies.

Yeah those are definitely good too. I have one, but it's mostly connected to the computers and internet. So the internet worked for a long time, but running a computer makes the battery go out pretty fast.

Content warning: first world "steak too juicy" problems.

It is strange to have the opposite problem of the vast majority of people: even at age 45, I can lose weight too easily.

I recently went for a 7-day/6-night hiking trip. Due to the vagaries of national park permitting, there were 2 very short days in the trip such that my average was below 15 miles per day (for comparison, when I can hike as much as I want, I consider 20 miles the minimum for a full day). I carried as much food as I physically could. After the trip, I spent a week with family where my exercise was some daily walking, but mostly lots of eating, including plenty of meat, potatoes, and bread.

Upon returning home, I was still down 15 pounds from the trip start (210 down to 195 at 6'2"). Some of it water weight, but not much given the week of eating afterwards. It is very obvious in my suits where I have lost weight: some around the waist, but also my ass, thighs, and arms. My lifting numbers have suffered as expected.

I have another, longer trip coming up, so I am eating much more than usual. However, I don't have access to a all-you-can-eat cafeteria plan, so the Oliver Sacks 5 double cheeseburger/6 milkshake per day option is not available. Some bonus photos here.

I am curious to see what the trip does to me. I'm guessing I'll be under 190 by the end.

I feel that. With diet and weight training I can get up to ~170. Without, I drop to 145. The last time I had major surgeries, I got down under 130.

The bright side is, I usually look great for my age. Downside is, I get a two-week flu and look like a gulag inmate, and it takes me months to put the weight back on. My body just eats itself, constantly.

My body just eats itself, constantly.

Good way to put it. I occasionally wonder what exactly causes this kind of metabolism. I'm thankful that GLP1 is now a thing so that the odds are greatly reduced of us metabolic weirdos getting kidnapped and our bodies being picked apart to find the secret.

It's okay. Hunting you down to vivisect you would require hauling my bulk off this sofa :P

I can no longer stand catching the reflection of my beer belly when I walk past a window in the street, so promised my better half I'd commence a diet the Monday after I returned from our holiday. Since Monday the 13th my regimen has consisted of the following:

  • Intermittent fasting (only eating solids between 4pm-midnight)
  • No snacking between meals
  • No fried food
  • No fast food
  • Only one caffeinated beverage with milk per day (e.g. if I have a cappuccino in the morning, I cannot also have tea with milk that day – any other teas or coffees must be taken black)
  • No fizzy drinks (with the exception of sparkling water, or mixers like soda or tonic water)
  • No drinking alcohol on school nights

I grant myself one cheat day a week. The two bagels I ate on Saturday morning may have been the subjectively most delicious things I've ever eaten.

If my bathroom scale is accurate, I've lost 3.5kg so far. Will post here every week to keep myself honest until I've met my target weight or something approximating it.

Nice! Have you already decided which of the regimen changes are permanent? I'd recommend "no snacking", "no deep-fried food", "no fizzy drinks", "no alcohol on school nights".

That's the plan, yes. I intend to reincorporate fried food into my diet once I've reached my target weight, but deep-fried food (which is pretty much synonymous with fast food, as I don't own a deep-fat fryer) should be a rarity.

I grant myself one cheat day a week.

be careful. You can easily undo weeks worth of progress by one cheat day, especially if you're too harsh with your diet throughout the week, which would make your cravings stronger. You can consume whatever you want, the most important thing is your caloric intake/macros. I ate whatever I wanted when I was on a caloric deficit for 4 months, the 'bad' food was frontloaded at the start of the day so that it was easier for me to keep track. For example, if I wanted a piece of cake, I would eat in the morning and the rest of the meals would be a bit lower fat than usual since cake is high in fat. A little bit of foresight goes a long way.

I also suggest a 45-60 minute walk 2-3 times a week, it would speed up your results by 20-30%, not to mention all the other health benefits.

Thanks for the advice. I consistently walk at least 10,000 steps most days (over the last six months my average was just over 11k/day), so I think I'm alright on that front.

If the goal is reducing visceral fat, why the caffeine limitation? Everything else I get.

I can drink as many caffeinated drinks as I want, but only one of those drinks can have milk in it.

Rereading I now follow you.

It can jack up your cortisol and lead to fat storage.

I'm not sure that's true based on researching your statement. I see information that it can increase cortisol and adrenalin in people who do not consume it regularly, but does not actually increase long-term fat storage. In fact what I'm reading says caffeine can temporarily increase metabolism and therefore increase fat burning. Of course I only drink coffee black, but the question was about caffeine. Mind you I've only briefly researched it, so you may have better information.

The research on caffeine is all over the place, I’ve seen different studies that say both.

That's a pretty good amount of weight! I posted my beer belly in other avenues and was told that I actually didn't need to diet, just exercise, especially resistance training would help shed the ~10 lbs I want to lose. Thus commenced my effort to do 100 kettlebell swings every day, plus push-ups and bent rows for A days, pull-ups and push-ups for B days, plus half an hour of walking every day (at least), plus the complete cessation of the 2-4 hour naps I was taking all the time, plus no coffee after 2 PM (generally drinking about 32 fluid ounces of standard strength black coffee before then), plus eating fruits, vegetables, and (not so highly processed) meat.

I honestly think that the sleep was the best outcome from all this. The naps really were wasting a lot of time and not actually improving my restfulness, and now I feel awake all day until it's bed time. I should have known that would happen; the times I give up eating at lunch, I stop getting hungry at lunchtime. But the regular exercise is pretty great, too. I used to feel like a block of wood on some days, or earlier this year I felt like I couldn't use all of my lung capacity to breathe, but now I feel pretty mobile and my pulse was even under 60 the other day when I measured it. If my left knee didn't hurt after a couple miles, I'd try jogging even longer. I'm wondering if I should increase the kettlebell size, since doing 5 sets of 10 bent rows with 16 kilograms is kind of easy. Overhead pressing 16 kilograms is a bit more difficult, but generally I get a couple sets of 8 in before dipping down to 7 for the remaining 3. I guess swings with 20 kilograms would be better cardio than with 16 kilograms.

Fair play to you!

The frustrating thing is that I do shitloads of cardio, but apparently not enough to offset my poor diet. So diet it is.

I'm just starting to add consistent cardio, so it might have a decent effect on me in combination with the other stuff I'm doing. But be proud of your shitloads of cardio! I donated blood the other day and my blood pressure was 114/68, which is slightly better than it usually is. Do it for slightly better blood pressure!!

Now I'm curious what my blood pressure is. Must check the next time I go to give blood.

Funnily enough, one time I went to give blood and they checked my iron levels beforehand, and told me they were too low. The nurse explained that this can sometimes happen owing to recent intense exercise. I texted my brother "tfw pumping so much iron that I don't have enough in me :("

New Year's resolution check-in:

  • Went to the gym three times last week, only doing cardio. Went again yesterday and got back into strength training, bench press and deadlift.
  • Have not consumed any pornography since waking up on January 1st. Nearly at the halfway mark.

How goes it @self_made_human, @thejdizzler, @birb_cromble, @ThomasdelVasto and @falling-star?

Don't even ask. I mean, do, but if you're looking for exercise, it's mostly been impromptu backpacking and solo adventures. I think I did push-ups, once, last week.

Traveling in Germany this week, no progress on any goals. Check back with me next week.

Spending is $3,033.98 lower than the same day last year. The weather continues to delay the expensive home repair.

I went to the Philippines last week. I was invited to speak at a university function, and did. Positives: they paid for every damn thing, including the minibar. There are many many people who speak excellent English even in the most unlikely places. Negatives: wow, it is not Japan. Beggars, general dirtiness, garbage, slums (at least in parts of Manila, where I was only briefly.) Cheap shit everywhere. Rain and heat.

Contrary to numerous warnings from Japanese friends, I enjoyed all my meals. Lots of meats. At least two dead animals per meal, actually. (I love animals.) There was one Mexican place in Manila that had the most amazing Tacos al carbon I've had outside the US. A grungy place where i had to walk down the road to buy a beer, then bring it back to the Mexican place. The young guy behind the counter helpfully pried off the bottlecap (I had left my keys and keyfob with bottle opener in Japan.)

In the spirit of the thread, I'm fine. Recently had bloodwork done and my liver function is surprisingly normal, my kidneys, weak as they are, haven't deteriorated, and have in fact bounced back a bit. I still love my wife and my sons beyond measure. And at my job, the surgeons and dermatologists who work on my same floor have started acknowledging me in a quasi-friendly way. In Japan, the secret to human interaction when you yourself are not Japanese is: Be predictable.

Tacos al carbon

Tacos with activated charcoal filling?

Exactly.

Actually my friend who lived in Mexico a while told me when I wanted something Mexican to order that. It's basically tacos with charcoal-grilled beef. Good if you get good ones. Which makes sense, hey.

In Japan, the secret to human interaction when you yourself are not Japanese is: Be predictable.

Germany too.

I thought it was half a maB of hefeweizen

Donald Glover once quipped that Filipinas are the black women of Asian women. Did that jibe with your experience?

I find Filipinas almost unfathomably beautiful. And for some reason, 100% of those I've met have been either accountants or nurses (or some profession extremely similar to nursing).

I am not sure what Childish Gambino meant, but there were many very very pretty girls in my audience. Not quite Olivia Rodrigo level but close. I was stricken by their educated, articulate English, but that's probably my Japan experience.

For me, a thoroughgoing attractive Japanese girl with typical Japanese behavior is well nigh unbeatable in terms of attractiveness. That's probably a product of time on task. And of course for me any woman is only as beautiful as much as she resembles my wife.

Not quite Olivia Rodrigo level but close.

TIL Rodrigo is half-Filipina. I thought she was Hispanic.

You're welcome.

The global Latina belt strikes again.

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